Heart of Courage
by vakariangal
Summary: Selena gets a message from Joker to come to the Sushi Bar. She never expected this surprise. Takes place during the Citadel DLC and beyond. Rated T for mild language. Nothing worse than whats in game. Cover art by renegade64.
1. Wake-up Call

Heart of Courage Chapter 1●Wake-up Call

A/N-Some of the older chapters have been updated. Including this one. I just decided I needed to change them. I liked them better this way! Please R&R!-

Selena woke up laying by Garrus in her bed. She watched his chest rise and fall in rhythm with his breathing. After a few minutes she heard a grumble from Garrus and had actually wondered if he was waking up.

She watched him a little longer to be sure he was okay. He jerked in his sleep. Selena laid a hand on his arm to maybe supress whatever nightmare or dream he was having. He seemed to flinch when she touched him,like he was afraid.

She removed her hand and watched him again. She suddenly noticed he was shaking. Selena shook his arm to wake him but it didnt work.

She rubbed her hand over his arm in a comforting motion. It was the only thing she knew to do. She stopped when he opened his eyes.

"Im sorry. I didnt mean to wake you." She apologized.

"Its okay. What are you doing up?"

"Thinking. You cant sleep when your brains going a mile a minute, you know?"

"Believe me. I know." He answered.

Before she could stop herself she asked. "What were you having a nightmare about?"

He took in a breath. It was obviously something that bothered him and she wished she hadn't said anything.

"When the reapers hit Palaven. I was scared for myself yes, but I was scared more for my family and you. To me you are family."

She shook her head and smiled. "You don't have to worry about that anymore. Ill always be here." She mentally slapped herself for saying that. Who knew if she was going to even be alive tomorrow. This war didnt allow for much decision. It was die, die or die. That was it.

"I know."

Selena wanted to comfort him in anyway possible. She knew that in a few days they would be back fighting and honestly she didnt want to think about it. She just wanted to stay here with Garrus forever, but she knew in the back of her head that they would probably never have that.

Selena just wanted to pretend that the Reapers didnt exist. That had seemed to work for the council...its obvious it didnt turn out for them considering they're dead.

Selena had had the option to save the council but she felt that they never helped her so why should she help them.

Besides the best thing they had given her was her Spectre authority, also she just hated their guts. Maybe it was wrong to speak ill of the dead but she had grown quickly tired of Sparatus' frickin air quotes every time Reapers were brought up in conversation. When they had figured out the truth they were terrified she knew but she had no remorse for them.

Then when the Reapers hit Earth, everyone was trying to get her help, she had tried numerous times to get everyone to believe her, to buy them time to be ready but no.

They say "lets wait until we can see first hand what these abominations can do and then ask Shepard for help after she had tried to help within the last few years. We arent prepared but we can survive."

They can kiss my ass! She thought. Selena was brought out of her thoughts by Garrus getting out of bed.

"Where are you going?"

"Bathroom. Ill be back."

She nodded and watched him enter the bathroom. She laid there wondering how she got so lucky to find someone like him.


	2. Shore Leave

Chapter 2●Shore Leave

Selena stood in the CIC later on that morning in her N7 hoodie, jeans and combat boots,sipping a cup of coffee. If you could call it coffee. It was more like "Here. Have your coffee flavored paste/gel/beverage. Its not real coffee but it works for the caffeine." Honestly the only reason she drank it was for the caffeine. It kept her awake and on edge all day, it kept her ready to fight.

Selena was trying to figure out their next destination. She really wanted to just pass it by and call it quits for today just so she could go sit in the Battery with Garrus.

Selena had become accustomed to sitting on crates in the corner when she went in with him. It was just kinda her thing, even though everytime she came in he would say something about sitting on his cot.

She honestly never remembered what he said about it. Sure maybe she should listen but she was always to occupied watching his talons on the keyboard wondering 'how he could type so fast with only three fingers?' Selena would watch the words go by on the screen and wonder once again 'how he could read that text?' It was all greek to her.

Selena decided she needed to start paying attention once she felt something hot go all over her hand. She had been so engrossed in her memory that she had spilt coffee all over herself.

"Ah frickin hell!"

"EDI I have to go change. Can you get someone to clean this up for me?" Within seconds the AI responded.

"Of course Commander. Anything else?"

"Nope." Selena said impatiently.

"Logging you out Commander."

Selena sighed and started on her way to her cabin. She felt so stupid for dumping "coffee" on herself. She really needed some serious down time. This was the most stressful time, they were almost ready to plan the final attack.

Selena punched in the access code for her cabin and went to her dresser. She was in the middle of changing her clothes when her console 'binged' alerting her of a new message.

The sound suprised her, making her fall over. "Ouch! Frickin people, always bothering me." Selena finished pulling her pants on and went to her console. It was Hackett.

'Commander Shepard,

I'm ordering the Normandy into drydock on the Citadel for much needed repairs. She's seen a lot of action lately and needs a little TLC.

A small army of techs will take care of the details once you arrive, so let's get your crew out of there. You're all on shore leave: that's an order. We need everybody at their best.

One more thing: Admiral Anderson has an apartment on the Wards. Head over there when you arrive. I hear it's a nice place.

Admiral Hackett'

Selena had to admit, she was very ready for Shore Leave. She knew the rest of her crew was too. 'Well, I know where we're going.' Selena thought. Time to alert the crew.


	3. Get Moving

Chapter 3●Get Moving

Selena walked through the crew deck alerting crew. She knew she could do it through messaging but she preferred to tell them directly. The last one was Garrus.

"Hey Garrus. We have Shore leave on the Citadel for a few days, thats an order from Hackett."

Garrus saluted. "Aye Aye. Are any of us allowed to stay on the ship?"

Selena gave him a look that could kill.

"The Normandy is due for repairs so we have to be off the ship."

Just as she was about to finish her sentence Joker came over the intercom.

"We are docked at the Citadel."

Selena looked at Garrus and put on her, very well practiced,'Im Commander and I told you to move' look.

He was still typing away at his console seeming to be ignoring her. She started clapping her hands. "Move! Move! Move, soldier!" He immediately popped his head up from the console and started packing his bag. She walked over and patted him on the shoulder. "Good boy." She turned around and walked out to go pack her own bag.

Selena went to the elevator to go to her cabin. Immediately she started packing. She was so ready for Shore Leave, and see this apartment they were talking about. Certaintly Anderson wasn't going to let her and her crew use it for free, she knew he would do it being as good a guy as he was but she couldn't let him.

"Commander, I dont know if you heard me earlier but we are docked at the Citadel. Is anyone going to start leaving the ship or are we staying on the ship I presumed we were leaving?" Joker said sarcastically.

Selena gasped in suprise at the sudden voice. She sighed.

"Yes Joker, I heard you. We are all in the progress of packing our bags...got it."

"Yes Commander. Good grief, you are really in need of shore leave arent you?"

She sighed and took in a few breaths. Usually she could easily handle Jokers sarcasm, she'd throw it right back, but at this point she WAS in need of shore leave and she had so much tension she thought she might explode.

"Shut up Joker." Selena ground out through clenched teeth. She figured he must have gotten the message when she never heard a response.

Selena finished packing her bag and actually had a smile on her face.

"Lets go have some fun!" She walked out the elevator door to meet her entire crew standing in the CIC waiting for her. "Ready to have some fun Commander?"

She smiled. "You got it."


	4. Relax and Nevermind

Chapter 4●Relax and...Nevermind

Selena and her crew boarded the Citadel faster than rats scurrying off a sinking ship.

"Apparently everyone is ready for Shore Leave." She about toppled over when she heard Garrus right beside her.

"Geez! I thought you were with the rest of the crew."

She breathed in harshly a few times to catch her breath and looked at him, holding her hand over her heart and patting her chest as if trying to restart her heart. "A few minutes more and I'd of been dead...again." She said dramtically.

Garrus punched her on her arm. Luckily he didnt see her grabbing her arm and mouthing 'ow!'. She never had the heart to tell him that even with the implants, that still hurt.

Selena decided she needed to find a place for food. She started walking through the wards, hoping to find something. She noticed a Turian following her out of the corner of her eye but she dismissed it, she just figured she was being paranoid or maybe he was going this way for a shop.

On her way someone pinged her. "Seriously! I just want some frickin food!" She stopped and sat down on a bench to check her message. It was Joker.

'Hey Shepard,

I've got a few things I wanted to go over with you. With the Normandy in dry dock, I figured we could meet up at that Ryuusei sushi place down in the Wards. I hear it's the best.

Joker'

She laughed and shook her head. "How appropriate." She started on her way to the restraunt when she saw the same Turian.

'What the-okay Selena you are freaking yourself out. All Turians pretty well look the same anyway.' Selena said to herself to calm herself down.

Selena arrived at the place and told the waitress that she had a table with someone already. She looked around until she saw Joker, he waved at her and smiled.

"Hey Commander! Good timing. Just about to order."

She smiled and started to sit down. Just as her butt about hit the seat she saw the Turian again. She sat down with an audible plop and groaned. She felt a hand on her shoulder.

"You alright Commander?"

She sighed. "No not really. Look over in the corner by the door, you see the dark colored Turian too right?"

He looked at her confused.

"Umm, yeah. Why?"

She let out the breath she didnt know she was holding and sighed in relief.

"I thought I was going crazy. That same Turian has been following me pretty much the whole time we've been on the Citadel."

He laughed. "Maybe you should go talk to him, see what he wants."

She patted him on the arm. "Thanks Joker, your a genius!"

"Ow! Watch the arm will you!"

As she walked away she mouthed sorry. As she got closer to the Turian he walked closer to her.

"What do you want you overgrown Cockatoo?"

He looked at her strange. "I have no clue what that is but my name is Casius Quinsis, but every one calls me Cass."

He held out his hand. She took it, being a little weary. "Commander Shepard. Most people call me Selena or Lena."

She shook his hand and he held onto hers longer than she thought was necessary. "As I asked before what do you want?" She asked annoyed.

"I am here to warn you of a-"

A small dark skinned woman ran in the room in alliance blues.

"Commander Shep-ah!" She started as she fell on her butt. She got up and brushed off the dust.

"Sorry Commander. I must speak to you. You are being hunted down."

Selena scoffed.

"Yeah as if I didnt know that already."

"They are trying to kill you!" The woman exclaimed.

"Yeah, once again, I already know this."

The woman groaned. "I am Staff Analyst Maya Brooks, Alliance Intelligience...Ma'm." She said nervously.

"Calm down Brooks. What is it?" Selena was starting to get frustrated.

"There is a group of mercenaries trying to kill yo-"

Just as she went to finish her sentence a shot rang off. A team of mercenaries walked in the bar and started shooting at the ceiling.

"This is not a test. Everyone run or you will die."

Selena couldnt help the snort that left her mouth at that statement. She was going to have to remember that one,now to figure out who the hell these people were.

Selena started walking towards them and put her hand on the end of,who appeared to be the leader of the teams, assault rifle to keep him from shooting her, atleast he'd hit the floor.

She saw Cass look over at her like 'what are you doing?' And shake his head. They were on shore leave she knew but that didnt keep her from bringing her pistol with her. She pulled her pistol, walked up to the merc and pushed the barrel of her gun right underneath his chin. 'Well that caught the idiots attention.' She thought as his whole team aimed their guns right at her.

"Talk or you die."

He huffed. "You shoot and my men will kill you."

She just dug the barrel into his chin, making him flinch. He may have been wearing armor, but either way, that was going to hurt. Her finger twitched on the trigger and the next thing she knew her pistol was flying through the air.

Cass had pulled it out of her hand and threw it, sliding across the floor and behind a table.

"What are you doing?!"

He rolled his eyes. "Saving your idiotic life. Your outnumbered."

Before she had a chance to grab her own pistol again the mercs were shooting at them. Selena looked ar Cass.

"Well no pistol...thanks to you!" She complained.

He shrugged and ducked behind cover again. She thought he was an idiot to be looking out of cover unarmed but so far her opinion hadn't mattered. 'Ive got to find something!' She thought. She decided her only choice was to do the stupid thing and look out of cover.

'Wait a minute.' She looked at Cass and held up her arm releasing her omni-blade. Selena nodded to her arm and to them, motioning for him to help her lure them to her. 3 minutes later she ran towards the last merc, dodging bullets along the way. She released the omni-blade and stabbed him straight through the chest.

"How do you like that!"

"Commander?!" She heard Brooks call.

"Where are you?" Selena asked.

She saw a data pad stick up in the air and she couldnt help but chuckle. A few moments later she was standing over her with medi-gel.

"Here Brooks this wi-"

"Oh shi-" She yelled as she saw a merc get up off of the floor. He wasnt going to last long but that didnt keep him from...'hes not going to? Yeah hes going to.' She wanted to move but couldnt.

"Commander!"

Cass and Brooks yelled in unison. "Ah crap!" She exclaimed as he shot the floor, making the floor break and sending her with it, water and all.

She knew she hit every bump on the way down. She was eliciting a series of grunts, groans and profanities on the way down. She finally hit the ground.

"Ow..." She groaned.

She grabbed her side and got up. "Now where to?" She looked around looking for a place to go.

"Looks like I'm going to be here awhile."


	5. Citadel-Underground

Chapter 5●Citadel-Underground

Selena finally pushed herself up off the floor,she knew she had to be cautious,she was being chased. She had to find a gun. She happened to look down at her feet and saw a pistol laying there.

"Yes!" She exclaimed. She covered her mouth shortly after.

"Idiot..." She said outloud.

Selena picked the pistol up and checked the magazine.

"A full magazine. What is this?" She looked it over multiple times. She had no clue what type it was and she had used pretty well every pistol that existed.

"Well, no time to just sit here and admire it." Selena sarted on her way down the hallway.

She had no idea where she was let alone if anyone but Cass and Brooks new she was down here.

'Somebody please let my crew know.' She was half dead, without medi-gel or extra ammo. Once she was out she was out, unless she found more that is.

Each time she heard something she swore she had a mini panic attack, she needed to calm herself down. Selena sat against the wall and completely concentrated on her thoughts.

'Breath in, breath out, breath in, breath-what was that!' Her head shot up and she shot the wall that her mind was apparently making her think was a person.

She proceeded down the hallway, she could see a small light at the end. She heard footsteps behind her,she immediately froze,she whipped around to shoot the wall again.

"You idiot! Your wasting ammo!"

She immediately covered her mouth. 'Nice work you idiot! If anybodys down here they know your here now!' She thought.

She walked alittle farther and she saw a shadow standing by one of the carts. She aimed at the shadow,never taking her eyes off of it, until she heard gunfire. She was being shot at by those annoying merc wannabees.

Twenty minutes later after fighting through two waves of the mercs her comm crackled.

"Lena are you okay?" Her eyes widened.

"Garrus!"

That came out sounding much more scared than she wanted. 'Great scare him more.' She thought.

"Are you okay?" He asked again.

"Im so-so. I hurt and am just about out of ammo and I swear I have glass sticking me in my back."

She heard him take in a breath at that last sentence. She knew it bothered him and regretted saying it afterwards.

"Lucky for you Archangel is your boyfriend."

'I like the sound of that!' She thought.

"I am more than ready to be out of here. Ill keep you on my comm link as long as I can."

Her comm crackled letting another voice through.

"Shepard!"

"Brooks?"

"After I'm off with you don't use your comm. It will endanger anyone who talks to you. The mercs are tracking you."

"Good work." She sighed.

"Garrus do you read me?" A few seconds passed by.

"You alright?"

She chuckled, he always worried about her.

"Yeah. Brooks just let me know not to use my comm because anyone I talk to it will endanger. We have to get off of each others comms as fast as possible."

"Not gonna happen!"

"Garrus I want to keep you safe. Get off the line. We'll see each other soon enough. I lov-...Garrus?!" The last thing she heard from his side was gunshots.


	6. Finding You

Chapter 6●Finding You

Selena was frantic. She had to get to Garrus but first she had to figure out how to get out of here. She knew Garrus could hold his own but he was distracted, that worried her more than anything.

She kept trying to tap into his comm. She wanted to keep him safe but she had to know, at this point she could care less if they found her through communications, she'd shoot them point blank in the face.

"Garrus, do you read me?"

Static.

"Garrus?"

Static.

She started running,trying to get to the end as fast as possible. She kept running and running, it seemed like it went on forever.

She was just about to stop when..."Ah!" Selena screamed. She could hear gunfire above her. She had been shot, in the leg, of course.

'Now how am I supposed to get anywhere?' Her pistol had been flung God knows where. She heard footsteps in front of her and opened her eyes.

"Bad day, Commander?"

The mercs were at it again.

"It is now." She rolled her eyes.

He pointed his rifle at her head.

"Make any sudden moves and your dead."

Selena rolled her eyes again.

"Oh yeah because im going to get up and run with a leg that has a bullet through it!"

She felt him push the rifle against her head.

"I mean it."

She decided she better shut up or she would most likely be dead. They stood there glaring at each other for what seemed like hours. She heard gunfire again, except this was a different gun.

"Garrus?"

The merc pushed the rifle onto her head again.

"I said no sudden moves."

The merc that had been watching her left her and ran after their attacker. Pretty soon she heard footsteps again, only these were much bigger.

"Garrus?"

The anticipation was killing her.

'Please be Garrus! Please be Garrus!' She prayed inwardly.

"Sorry, not Garrus. I am a Turian though."

"Cass? How'd you find me?"

"It was easy. I made my way down here and then followed the trail of dead mercs."

She laughed. "Yeah I guess I'm getting good at that. Makes it easier for me to find my way back you know."

Cass put his hand out. "Here let me help you up."

Selena pointed down at her leg.

"One of the mercs shot me in the leg. I feel so frickin helpless. Im not used to being flung around like a ragdoll!"

Cass cocked his head. "Ill explain later. Human idiom."

He nodded and kneeled down to help her. After a few agonizingly painful minutes he had her up and moving again.

"Which way?" He asked.

She shrugged. "I don't know. I could ask you the same thing."

She really felt helpless now. Cass had one arm over her shoulders, while she was leaning on him for most of her support. They got half way down the next "hallway" and she had to stop.

"Cass, I've gotta stop, whoa!" She exclaimed as she fell against the wall taking him with her.

They ended up nose to nose. It was awkward but neither of them made a motion to move. She caught herself reaching up to touch the side of his face. She stopped herself half way. 'What are you doing?!'

"Shouldnt we move?" She asked.

He finally moved away. "Sorry." He apologized.

When they went to move again he found it hard to touch her. After that moment earlier he almost wanted nothing to do with her.

"I hope we find Garrus soon."

"Me too." He agreed.

He just wanted to be rid of the memory of him half way pinning her up against the wall. It wasnt anything serious it was an accident, but in that moment, he realized he had feelings for her.


	7. No Betrayal

Chapter 7●No Betrayal

They had stopped for her to rest again and Selena couldn't shake what happened with her and Cass out of her head. She didnt want to admit to what she felt. She felt...she didnt know. All she knew was that when he fell against her, her own clumsy mistake, she felt something for him. Selena knew it couldnt be love, for one she just met him and two,she loved Garrus with all her heart, he is 'the one'.

"You know the human saying "love at first sight"? You made that saying come true that day." She was remebering their conversation from that building on Earth. She hung her head. 'It has to be in my head.'

She was pulled out of her thoughts by a hand on her shoulder. "Are you ready to go?" Cass asked.

She nodded. "Yeah."

She hoisted herself up the best she could until he had to grab her. "Where to now?" Selena asked.

"Well, straight down this walkway. Wherever it takes us."

She scoffed. "That's your plan?"

He chuckled. "It may not be a good plan, but its a plan."

Selena shook her head. At first she had to admit that she didnt like him but his demeanor had changed, he wasn't so stuck up. Selena yelped as her leg gave away.

"Alright! Wait...wait..." Cass set her down.

"Get the bullet out." She commanded.

"Wh...wha...what?" He stuttered.

"You heard me. Get the bullet out."

"I dont have what I need. I need a knife."

Selena moved enough that she could get to her pocket. "Here." She handed him her "lucky" knife. She had used it in emergencies that it saved her life so it was deemed her "lucky" knife, and as far as she was concerned this was an emergency.

"I need something for you to bite down on."

"I dont need anything."

He glared at her. "Yes,you do. No matter how tough you are,you still need it."

Cass looked around for a few minutes before coming back with a piece of...she didnt know what it was, but apparently he thought she could bite it. He handed her the...thing and she bit down.

"Ready?" He asked.

She nodded. The next few minutes we're nothing but her screams and blood. She opened her eyes wide and her back bowed as he cut deeper, eliciting a scream from her as he went. She just wanted it to be done. She couldn't explain the amount of relief she felt when she heard him say "Got it."

He set the knife on the ground, though it still burned and throbbed like it was still there. He grabbed the bottom of her shirt and ripped a piece of fabric off to cover the wound, not to mention stop the bleeding.

"Its going to be tough but I know this is what you wanted, can you stand?" He asked, reaching down to take her hand to make it easier for her. He pulled her up and she groaned.

"Da...shi...he..." She tried to say a string of profanities but they were all coming out so fast you couldnt hear them. She stood as straight as she possibly could, wincing everytime she would have to shift her weight to keep her stability.

"Okay,good. Can you walk?"

She stepped forward, her fists clenching, trying to keep from screaming. The pain was unreal. She eventually made it though. She had to admit, for having a hole in her leg, she was doing good.

Cass let go of her to get her knife. She walked around a bit more while he left. This was going to be tricky but she was Commander Selena Shepard, she had escaped death, she could handle this. He came back with her knife.

"Here." She put it away and turned to look at him. His green eyes watching her intently as she moved. Green on blue.

"Lets move shall we?" She didnt want the atmosphere to become awkward again.

"Coming." He was following right behind her the whole time but she didnt notice. The only thing she could think about was getting to Garrus again.


	8. Because I Love You

Chapter 8●Because I Love You

Selena and Cass had been walking for hours. She had begun to ignore the pain and just think about where they were going. They had been lucky not to run into any mercs again...yet.

Selena made sure she was keeping her distance from Cass. She knew deep in her heart that she had feelings for him, she couldnt say she loved him, the one she loved, was Garrus.

They kept walking and walking...and walking til finally Selena heard something very familiar.

"Get down!" They heard.

She didnt care about her leg, she just ran. She got around the corner to see Garrus taking cover behind a crate while mercs were shooting at him. He had 3 left. Selena kept her position and fired her pistol, each shot hitting them in the head.

Garrus turned around then to see Selena. She smiled at him.

"Long time, no see."

She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him. "I thought I'd never see you again. Are you ok?"

He buried his head in her neck. "Yeah. Im fine, what about you?"

He looked down to see her leg wrapped. "Umm. Well I got shot in the leg, Cass came and killed the mercs otherwise I'd of been dead. Cass dug the bullet out and wrapped it so I could atleast walk somewhat."

She was talking so fast at that point she even reminded herself of a salarian. She decided she would skip the part about Cass falling into her on the wall and him practically carrying her until he dug the bullet out. Garrus looked at Cass and glared at him. She knew what was going on, jealousy.

"Thank you." Garrus ground out. It was obvious he had forced himself to say it.

Selena put her hand in the middle of his chest, backing him up. "Whats your problem?" She asked.

He shook his head. "What do you mean?"

She looked back at Cass. "Why are you being so...so...jealous?"

He scoffed. "I'm not being jealous."

"Oh,really?"

"Really."

She sighed. "Fine then. Lets get out of here. I'm more than tired of this place. Where to?"

Garrus held his hand up. "Joker?"

A few moments of static.

"Garrus?" Joker asked.

"Yeah. Bring a shuttle in for evac. We will pinpoint our destination on your omni-tool. We've found an open area where the shuttle can come in. Make sure you have room for...three."

"Aye Aye." Selena walked a few more steps and apparently whatever adrenaline or something that had been keeping the pain away was gone. She groaned in pain as her leg gave away.

"Lena, come here." Garrus put his arms around her and picked her up bridal style.

"You know if we run into anyone you'll drop me." She chuckled.

He shook his head. "No I wont."

They got to the end of the open space waiting for the shuttle when they heard more mercs on their way. "Dammit they just wont leave us alone!"

Garrus sat Selena down behind a crate. "Dont move." He ordered.

"Im the Commander here. I say what-"

"Lena!"

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah...yeah...yeah. Fine."

Just as they started firing at the mercs the shuttle came in, with an unexpected guest. Wrex jumped off the shuttle and started ripping them apart. Wrex picked the merc up and slammed him on the ground, stomping on his head. The gunfire stopped.

Garrus reached down and picked her up again.

"You ready to finally go see your new apartment?"

"Garrus we have more to worry about than the apartment right now."

"Yeah, your right. Your leg. Ill get a hold of Chakwas once we get there."

Selena started to talk but he just covered her mouth. "Quiet."

They jumped on the shuttle and started their way to the apartment. 'This is going to be interesting.' She thought as Garrus and Cass stared each other down, looking like they were going to start a blood bath. Selena sighed as they all sat there in awkward silence.


	9. Seriously!

Chapter 9●Seriously?!

They had arrived at her apartment but the atmosphere hadn't changed at all. Garrus and Cass were still having a disagreement in their minds, luckily they weren't vocal or physical about it but she figured it would just take them time.

She wanted to stop them but Liara had informed her otherwise. She had told her that in Turian customs when one has chosen a mate and he feels there is another to claim his mate they become very overprotective and never leave their mates side. Plus that this 'staring contest' wasn't abnormal, it happened often.

She also told her to not be suprised if they did start fighting. Selena just hoped it didn't come to that.

She was laying on the couch, leg wrapped. She wasnt allowed to move for two days. Well she could its just she had to use crutches. She felt like Joker, but none the less that still wasnt good.

They had mercs tracking her and a reaper war to fight, she couldn't just sit around. She finally stopped mentally complaining and grabbed her crutches.

"Anybody want something to eat? I'm starving. Liara?" Selena offered.

Liara shrugged. "Sure." She came in the kitchen with her.

"Garrus, Cass?" They still didn't look away from each other and she was starting to get worried, they we're growling at each other.

"Yeah, I thought not." She rummaged through the fridge til she found some meat and bread and made her a sandwich.

"Liara, can you eat human food?"

"Yes. We're an all Levo based race but our main food source is vegetables." Selena laughed.

"So your a vegan?"

"Pardon?"

Selena cracked a smile. "Its a human 'thing'. We call ourselves vegetarians or vegans when all we do is eat vegetables and this awful 'meat'", she air quoted with her fingers,"called Tofu. As far as I'm concerned...its not meat."

Liara was enjoying listening to her. "What is Tofu?"

Selena motioned to the couch. "Come on. Lets go sit down and I'll explain."

Liara nodded. They ventured to the couch and as they passed Selena watched Garrus and Cass. Neither of them moved, not even their eyes, it was weird. She could understand Garrus' side but why was Cass doing it too? There was nothing in between them, was there? Selena was just about to the couch when she started having flashbacks. They had started ever since her and Cass had that...incident.

She saw her and Garrus leaned up against a pillar in the Citadel wards. They were talking about something. Garrus motioned to go back somewhere and Selena smiled and took his hand. They were going back to the Normandy. They were through the airlock. She took his face in her hands and...the memory switched.

It was her and Cass in the 'underground' of the Citadel. She was leaned up against the wall his hands on either side of her head. She was starting to reach up to touch his face but decided against it. Then she saw him do something she didnt notice before. He leaned his forhead against hers.

She came out of it and noticed she was breathing much harder than she should have been. She got really dizzy and the next thing she heard was a muffled "Selena! Are you okay? Garrus! Snap out of it! Selena is losing consciousness."

She didnt hear his voice before she passed out.


	10. You Claim Me

Chapter 10●You Claim Me

When Selena woke up her ears were ringing and her head was throbbing. She opened her eyes to see two blue ones. Liara was standing over her watching her intently. Selena tried to move and Liara pushed her back down.

"Lena you need to stay still. When you fell you hit your head, you have a large cut on the back of your head that Dr Chakwas is going to come wrap. I would do it but I dont have the materials."

Selena nodded but wished she hadn't when she grimaced.

"Wheres Garrus?"She asked half aware.

"Hes sitting on the couch downstairs."

Selena just then realized they were in the bedroom.

"Wheres Cass?"

Liara reached behind her to grab a data pad.

"He left after he heard you were okay. He told me to give you this."

Liara said handing her the data pad. Selena blinked a few times to focus her eyes.

'Selena,

I decided to leave so you and your mate could be in peace. Im sorry. Ive been such an ass. Thank you for what time I have been with you. It was a honor.

Cass'

Selena couldnt help but feel the distance between them now.

"I need Garrus."

"Of course."

A few moments later Garrus came up.

"Garrus."

She reached out for him and he closed the space quickly. He took her hand and hugged her.

"How are you feeling? What happened?"

She looked down at Garrus' feet.

"I'm alright. I'm really not sure. I got dizzy and then collapsed."

She felt horrible for lying but she couldnt tell him why although in the back of her head she had a feeling he knew. She needed to know.

"Garrus...I..."

"Lena."

"Garrus I need to know why you were fighting for me? Why were you...asserting your dominance?"

She knew that sounded cheezy but she had no other way to explain it. His demeanor instantly changed.

"Garrus I dont want to make you angry but I have to know."

He seemed to calm himself down.

"He...h..."

"Garrus?"

"He marked you."

She looked at him strange. She knew about the marking where they bite for dominance but he hadn't bitten her.

"What do you mean? He didn't bite me."

He sighed and pulled a chair over to sit down, never letting go of her hand.

"Theres different types of marking. Theres the marking with a bite and the theres a mark with pheromones. We put our foreheads against our mates forehead to release pheromones. We claim them."

"So he's 'claimed' me?"

"Yes. Do you have...feelings for him?"

"I...I...don't know. All I know is that I love you. No matter what, I love you."

She squeezed his hand reassuringly.

"I love you."

He relaxed.

"I...love you too."

She could see Liara smiling out of the corner of her eye.

Now she had to resolve the problem of Cass. This was going to be a long week.


	11. Care To Explain

Chapter 11●Care to Explain

Selena was trying to locate Cass...with crutches, not very easy. She had asked EDI to find out his location but she couldnt find him either. He had just disappeared. She sure wasnt going to try talking to the council. They werent the same people but they were still political morons. Selena had to sit down. Her leg was bothering her. She leaned her head against her hand and closed her eyes. After Garrus told her that, she couldnt sleep, she was so frickin tired she just wanted to go back to bed but she knew she had to resolve the problem first. Selena had started to doze off when she heard a familiar gravelly voice.

"Tired Shepard?"

She flung her head up, suprised at the sudden intrusion.

"Cass? Ive been looking for you everywhere. Where were you?"

He shrugged. "Ive been here, on the Citadel."

Selena snorted.

"You sure could've fooled me. I asked EDI to help pinpoint your location and she found you no where on the Citadel."

Cass looked at his feet.

"I turned off my omni-tool so no one could bother me or find me. I didnt want to have to admit the truth to you."

She had a feeling he could sense she knew something.

"Yeah, no need. Garrus told me. How could you do that? I have a mate. You cant have two at once, atleast my people cant."

"I'm sorry. My...feelings took over and I wasn't thinking, but I have to ask one thing?"

They sat there in silence.

"Are you going to ask or what?"

"Do you have feelings for me?"

Selena' eyes just got bigger than her head. She was shocked that he would ask that but she was more afraid to answer it. She didnt even want to admit it to herself.

"I...I dont know."

"How can you just not know? You either feel something or you dont?"

Selena shook her head. She really didnt know what to say. She know what she felt but was afraid to say it.

"I just don't know."

Cass growled.

"Lets put it this way."

He pulled her up off the bench and pushed her up against the column.

"Do you feel anything when I do this?"

He kissed her. She knew that Turians didnt 'kiss' per say. He had to have done some research. She didnt want to admit to herself that she had kissed him back. He broke the kiss. Both of them panting, she out of suprise.

"Did you feel anything?"

She breathed in as deep as she could, preparing herself for the shit storm she was going to have between Cass and Garrus and her and Garrus.

"Y...yes."

He gave her a Turian smile.

"Thats all I needed to know."

She shook her head and sighed.

"Cass you have to think about this though. I cant be with both of you. I cant love two people and be with both. I have to choose and I choose Garrus. Hes been there for me from the beginning and I'm sorry Cass but, I love you but I love him more."

Cass hung his head.

"I understand. Ill leave you two alone from now on. Please hesitate to call me."

Selena felt horrible. She had hurt Cass, but she knew she would pick Garrus. There was no way around that. She loved Garrus with all she was. She would die for him and hell ,he'd almost died for her. Now it was time to go back to the apartment. She had some research of her own to do.


	12. Casino

Chapter 12●Casino

A/N-This chapter may be a little disturbing to some people. Its part of Selena's past.-

Selena arrived back at the apartment. She threw the crutches across the room, tired of using them. She could walk just fine. She walked up to the table across from the living room. She wondered where all her crew had gone. There was a hologram of a...casino.

"Dont tell me thats where were going..."

"Afraid it is."

Selena jumped.

"Whoa...sorry."

Garrus rested up against the table.

"Whats so bad about a casino?"

Selena shook her head.

"Dont worry about it. Its stupid."

"Lena, you can tell me anything."

She exhaled.

"Its just...when I was a kid...I didnt have any parents, I made do on my own. Shelter was usually an old trash bin or under a porch. I made do for food with scraps I'd find in garbage cans behind restraunts. Then one day I decided I'd try looking through this certain buildings trash bin. I figured out quickly I shouldn't have."

She exhaled again, clutching the table like if she let go she would die.

"I walked over to the trash bin and an old man walked out of the back door. He spotted me and an evil, disgusting smile came across his lips. He was drunk and out of money, depressed, but that was no reason for what he did to me."

Garrus put his hand on her shoulder, comforting her.

"He grabbed me by the collar of my coat and drug me behind the trash bin. What he did to me was unbelievable. I came out of there running and crying, blood all over my face. I just dont want to go and find another like that."

Garrus squeezed her shoulder.

"Remember, I'll be here now. Anyone tries to hurt you...I'll kill them."

Hearing that made her feel much better than she had. She sometimes forgot that she had someone now.

"Thanks Garrus."

She closed the inch of space in between them and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Never leave me."

"Why do you think I would?"

"Just please never leave me."

He hugged her tighter.

"I wouldn't, couldn't leave you."

"I love you Garrus."

"I...love you too Lena."


	13. Black Tie

Chapter 13●Black Tie

Selena and Garrus stood at one side of the table, Liara, Edi and the others on the other side. They were talking about how they were going to infiltrate the Casino and not get caught. They had cameras everywhere.

"EDI,I'll need you with us."

"Im afraid I cant Shepard. They wouldn't allow me entry."

"I know Garrus is coming with me."

She looked down at their joined hands, comforted by the odd but not unpleasant feeling.

"We need someone with tech specialty. I want someone who knows what they're doing. Not that you dont Garrus but I need you by my side."

"No worries Lena. I couldn't fit through the vent anyway."

Selena chuckled.

"Ill go with you! Provided I have a tag along with me." Brooks piped up.

"Okay. Who wants to go with Brooks?"

The room went silent.

"Really? Does anyone want to go?"

James looked at Brooks.

"Ill go with her Lola."

She nodded towards James in a silent thanks.

"Alright, now that we have that done...heres the worst part...its black tie."

"You're frickin kidding me right?"

Selena shook her head.

"Afraid not James. Liara has helped us each find some formal wear to use."

They all nodded and thanked Liara though she could tell no one liked the thought of a black tie event. Hell, she didnt either. They were soldiers not some prissy civilian.

"Alright. Get your plans together and get dressed. As soon as everyone is done we're going to be on our way."

They all nodded in acknowledgement.

Everyone left leaving Selena and Garrus by themselves.

"Am I allowed to see the dress your wearing tonight?"

She nodded.

"Nope. Not til tonight. Just dont get your hopes up. It wont be the blue one. That got entirely destroyed the day we were on Earth."

"Got it. See you tonight Lena. Ive got to run back to the ship and grab a few things including my clothes. I have a pair if civvies that will work."

"Okay. See you soon."

He let go of her hand and immediately she felt the warmth fade. As soon as he walked out of the door, the separation was agonizing. What was going on with her.


	14. Its All About The Enterance

Chapter 14●Its All About the Enterance

Selena and Garrus stood side by side in their formal wear. They hated it but she had to admit they did look nice. They were talking about how they were going to enter. Liara was gabbing about different ways to sneak in.

"You know, just to make it easier, why dont we just enter like normal. With everybody else..."

They all looked at each other.

"Good idea."

Selena shook her head. "I try."

Liara finished rewriting the plan for entry.

"Who's ready to go?"

A few moments later they were at the Casino enterance.

Selena was arm and arm with Garrus while James was arm and arm with Brooks. Brooks was just doing it for appearance but James seemed to see more than that. He was certaintly smiling.

Selena was weary to go in but she immediately relaxed when she felt Garrus tighten his grip. They walked in the door and everyone was clapping. 'They must know who we are.' She thought. Garrus waved at a few people. Selena was walking more...seductive than normal, and Garrus had noticed. It was just for appearance but apparently it had drawn Garrus' attention.

"Did you wear this dress just for me?" He whispered to her.

"Partially. The other reason being that if I didnt...I might look a little funny walking into a black tie event in armor."

Garrus chuckled.

"Damn Lola! You look...awesome." James piped up.

He knew he should have kept his mouth shut when Garrus growled at him.

The casino wasnt bad at all when she had Garrus with her. Now to start mingling. She didnt want to but Liara had told her that it was all for the sake of the mission.

"Okay, where to first?"

Garrus let go of her arm and grabbed her hand.

"You lead the way."


	15. Interruption is Necessary

Chapter 15●Interruption is Necessary

Liara had given Selena a pair of lenses that would allow her to see electro magnetic fields for the cameras. She didnt much like the idea of wearing lenses until she saw her eyes and internally said 'Awesome!'. It made her eyes glow red, it made her look intimidating. Selena walked around the corner to find a guard by the camera. "Crap..." She waved Garrus over.

"Im going to need you to distract that guard. Ive got to get to that camera."

Garrus nodded. "Got it."

He walked over casually.

"A human! Perfect. Im kinda in a disagreement with my human girlfriend. Could you give me some insights?"

Selena couldn't help snickering.

"Im no expert Sir."

Garrus shrugged and walked off.

"You have a good night now."

"Did you get it?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

They moved on and finished the last few cameras. Brooks was doing good. They were about to Khan's office. She just wanted to know who had stolen her identity.

A few moments later they were in Khan's office. Selena had a few questions for him.

"Khan?"

Silence.

He was facing a video screen. Brooks walked over and turned the chair around. Khan was dead. A bullet right through the head. Brooks managed to hack the terminal but sadly all the data had been deleted.

"Dammit! This is my fault! I wasnt fast enough."

Selena turned her around to look her in the eyes. "Its not your fault. No one could have known." She nodded and calmed down a little bit. Out of sheer luck Selena figured out that they had left the Comm. It hadn't been deleted. Selena brought the conversation up but the image was distorted so badly you couldnt see who it was. After a few moments of listening they make out a sentence.

"Ill take everything Shepard is, everything she owns."

Selena was irrate now. "Take the data chips and have EDI analyse them."

"Aye Aye."


	16. Start the Mission

Chapter 16●Start the Mission

"EDI, what have you found?"

"Miss Brooks and I have found something."

"Good work. What is it?"

Brooks chimed in this time. "Its a communications field. We found a list of purchases that were made. Weapons, mechs and more. We havent found much more than that."

Selena nodded. "Keep up the good work."

Just then Glyph came around the corner.

"Commander Shepard, your Spectre access code was used at the Citadel Archives."

"What...?"

Garrus then butted in. "The archives are very hush-hush. Even I couldnt get into them with being a member of C-sec."

"I want to know who in the hell is using my code...and my life."

Selena stomped off into the living room, sitting down on the couch and burying her head in her hands. 'What had she done to piss somebody off.' She just wanted to catch this person and beat the crap out of them and then turn them in for identity theft...if they weren't dead when she got done with them. She was so tired of battling an uknown enemy. Every enemy they had ever had was uknown until they uncovered the mystery. It just was so unfair.

Garrus had come in the room by now. "Lena, are you okay?"

Selena shook her head. "I just dont know anymore."

Garrus pulled her up against him. "Whats wrong?"

She buried her head in his chest. "Im so tired of battling and uknown enemy."

He hugged her tighter. "I know. There's something else bothering you though. What is it?"

Selena froze. The other thing bothering her was when Cass kissed her. She couldn't tell him. "No. Its just been whats going on with "fake Shepard". She air quoted. "Its been so annoying."

He rubbed her back. "I understand."

She was glad he didnt press her for more information. She didnt want to tell him, not yet. She didnt want to distract him. She couldn't lose him. He was her everything, her rock, her love. Now they had to go.

Selena got up off the couch, Garrus just watched her. He knew something was wrong. She hated keeping secrets from him but she just couldn't tell him.

"Everyone gear up!"

Selena heard a noise behind her and turned around. There stood a Volus with a pizza.

"Umm...should I even ask?" Selena said pointing to the Volus.

"I got the munchies." James said waving the Volus over.

He apparently didnt see him because he just stood there staring at Selena. "Who's gonna pay for the pizza?"

Selena had lost her patience. "Get out of here!"

James looked like a little kid pouting as the Volus walked out of the apartment holding his pizza.

"We've gotta go."

Selena walked to her armor locker that somehow her armor had gotten into. She hadnt brought it in. She figured Garrus had done it. She started latching the armor into place when she saw two big taloned feet come up behind her. She just pretended she didnt see him considering she just saw his feet from in between her legs.

She heard him clear his throat. "Yes Garrus?"

"Im going with you, right?"

Selena nodded. "Yes Garrus, you are going with me. Along with Javik."

Garrus' shoulders slumped. "I hate you..."

Selena sighed. "You seriously have got to learn to like him. He is...interesting but still."

"Fine..." Garrus turned around and walked away.

Some days he reminded her of herself as a child. She never had any parents to back-talk to but she could certaintly do it to strangers.

"Everyone geared up?"

"Affirmative!" Everyone yelled.

"Lets go catch us a thief."


	17. A Clone?

Chapter 17●A...clone?

"So...how do we get in here?" Selena asked.

"Well, its not going to be easy..." Brooks started but James butted in.

"Dont worry Lola, I have this." James said as he threw a bomb.

"James! What are yo...oh it worked! Good job James!"

James smiled a childlike smile.

The skycar landed and Wrex rushed out.

"Wrex,what are you doing?!"

She just heard him laugh and run.

"Oh boy..."

Everybody else followed behind Wrex and they always knew where he had gone, a blood and dead body trail.

"Uh-oh. Get down!" Selena yelled as Cat-6 assault troopers came out and targeting lasers were everywhere.

Wrex ran back out from the corner and took out all of the assault troopers while the rest of the crew took out the snipers.

"Good wor-" Selena stopped. She looked up on the catwalk to see someone holding brooks hostage.

"Drop your weapons or Brooks dies."

Selena dropped her sub machine gun. 'That sounds like...' Selena was broke out of her thoughts by shock when she saw who it was. "What the hell!" "Nice to meet you to, or should I say nice to meet me."

"Its Lena...a clone..." She heard Garrus say.

"So the bad guy is me...well alternate me?"

The clone rolled it's eyes. "Yes, I was created so they'd have spare parts for you if they needed them. Well...they didnt need them,so here I am." It took a breath. "I was "activated" 6 months ago. I learned to act human through neural implants." It continued.

"Why should I care? You're not worth the scrap that was used to create you."

"Insulting? Really?"

Now it was Selena's turn to roll her eyes.

"What do you want?"

"I look and sound exactly like you. I can do anything I want with your identity. Everyone will believe I'm the real Shepard and believe anything I say."

Selena scoffed. "Yeah...dont count on that. We can easily stop you. We've fought tougher than you."

"Everyone will believe I'm you if I'm the one Commanding the Normandy."

Selena hurried with her Omni-tool.

"Lock the Normandy down." There was nothing but static. The comm was blocked. "Crap!"

"Traynor, prepare for departure." The clone switched frequencies. "And you guys, get rid of the real Shepard and...friends..." It looked at Selena. "Good luck." It said,being cocky.

"You won't get away with this!" Selena yelled.

"On the contrary, I can. Go!" The clone yelled. Cat6 soldiers started repelling from the ceiling. There was a new one. A heavy, nothing but...armor.

"Oh...yay...hit the deck!" Selena yelled as the cat6 heavy started shooting right at them. "So what now Commander? Do we just sit here like the primitives you are?"

Selena cocked her head. "Enough with the primitives crap. That doesn't even make sense!" Selena charged at the heavy, glad she was a biotic so she had extra shields. Within a few minutes they had the heavy down, now it was just the peons. "Whos next?" Selena turned around to see nothing but dead bodies. "Wrex?"

"Shepard." She heard his deep voice behind her. "So I'm just gonna take a guess that you were the cause of all this? Not that I'm complaining."

"Umm...yeah. Wow! You humans are dumber than I thought!"

Selena just laughed, hoping that was a joke.

Selena kept walking and they reached a impasse. "Council clearance necessary." A monotone computer voice said. "Well, I dont have it so screw you!"

She waved to the crew. "Keep moving."

Across from the scanners she found medi-gel,ammo and a SMG mod. "Nice!" She exlaimed.

They continued on. "Commander, do you even know where were going?" Selena looked behind her at James.

"Umm...no...no I don't."

"Don't you think we need to hurry?"

Garrus was standing in front of Selena when he saw her open her eyes and they were bright red.

"Oh boy..." Garrus said.

"Don't you think I out rank you? Don't you think that I should give orders?"

"I wasn't giving an order...ma'm." James new her well enough to know that when she got this way you didnt just use any given name you wanted. She just got angrier, and to his honest embarrassment he had found that out the hard way the night they sparred when he was calling her Lola constantly. She got angry and he made her angrier and she broke his hand and he couldn't fight for...God knows how long, it felt like an eternity to him. Selena had admitted that she felt bad for hurting him, he was one of her best soldiers.

"Are you still back talking me soldier?"

'Uh-oh.' James thought.

"No ma'm."

"Fine. You're off the hook...for now."

Selena turned around and ran right into Garrus. He looked at her and shook his head. She knew he didn't approve of her "anger issues" but she couldn't help them...like she wanted to, they were just a part of her.

They once again continued walking, they finally reached a door. Selena opened it and they all walked in. "So...where are we?"

"Like hell if I know."

"Uh...Commander?"

"What? Oh...thats where we are."

On the far wall was Main Storage in big letters. 'How could I miss that?' Selena thought.

"Glyph?"

After a few moments a little blue orb came around the corner.

"How may I assist you Commander?"

"We're gonna need your help."

"Specify Commander."

"We need you to track me...well not me, the other Shepard."

"Understood."

Now that she knew that was taken care of they kept moving forward onto another catwalk. Selena kept seeing a blue light flashing behind her. "Glyph?"

"Yes Commander?"

"Go track the clone, the other Shepard. Not. Me."

"Understood." This time he flew off and didn't come back so all she could assume was that he had fully understood her this time.

They all heard a noise and stopped to look around. "Oh...our friends are back."

Two CAT6 troopers repelled down. "Theyre still alive!"

"Uh-oh..."

Right then over the radio, to their suprise, is the clone. "I need more time to access the vault."

Selena turned around and with two quick shots, she had both of the troopers down. "Nice shot." Garrus said. "Nows not the time to marvel at my marksman skills...but thank you." She smiled.

She motioned for them to continue forward and they stepped onto a platform that would take them down a level. "Do we have to go in there?" James asked as he looked into the vault.

"You being a chicken James?"

James suddenly stood taller.

"No ma'm."

Selena chuckled.

"Well...lets go."

"This path way might take us farther in...to...no way!" Selena looked into one of the display cases and found a new rifle. She picked it up. "Commander, are you sure you should take that?"

"Do you want to go through the same problem as earlier?"

"Ummm...no."

"This rifle if just like the old ones. It doesnt use clips."

"Nice."

"Come on, lets go."

Selena kept walking and motioned for everyone else to follow along, she hoped she didnt actually have to remind them constantly but she always did.

The vault opened up farther. "So,whos ready?" She asked as they walked farther into hell.


	18. Don't Mess With Shepard

Chapter 18●Don't Mess With Shepard

"Is it finally over?" Selena asked.

"Yeah...I think." James said as they all looked around at the giant pile of bodies.

Glyph came back suddenly startling Selena.

"Glyph? What'dya got?"

"Ive found 18 important past events."

Selena was very unamused.

"What about the clone? Your target?"

"The target ordered me away."

Selena frowned.

"Then go back after it dipshit!"

Glyph flew off and Selena took a breath and let it out with a groan. She was so getting tired of this.

Selena ignored her angry thought and kept moving. The next area was more archives. 'Oh yay!' Selena thought sarcastically. A message suddenly popped up on her Omni-tool alerting her that the target was close. "Okay, the target is close we just have one problem."

The rest of the crew looked at each other. "Okay?"

"That." Selena pointed. There, in the room they had to go into, was an atlas mech.

"So...how do we approach this?"

"Balls to the wall my friend!" Selena screamed as she ran towards the mech shooting it with the ammo she had.

The mech dropped down and turned around. 'It looks angry...well...the person controlling it does...' Selena thought as she got down into cover right before it shot off a rocket. Everyone unloaded their magazines into it, making it explode quickly.

Once again Glyph comes again. "There is a squad wishing to do bodily harm to you. Their title is Razor Squad. I also found a Elcor mating statue that was very interesting."

"Umm...thanks. Lets ignore the statue."

"As you wish." Glyph said before he flew off.

They continued down the catwalk...well what was left of it.

"Umm...we cant go any farther...unless we want to completely drop off the face of the earth that is."

"So we cant backtrack?"

Selena shook her head. "Nope."

"So, now where?"

"We go the other way. Just be cautious."

"Understood." Everyone said in unison.

They started the other way. Half way down the catwalk Selena hears Glyph.

"Please stop! Dont hurt Command-please dont shoot at this platform!" Selena couldnt help the giggle that left her mouth at hearing that.

"Alright lets go! Double time it!"

They ran towards the cover in front of them and took cover, taking out the few snipers and assault troopers quickly.

"Well that was quick. Razor squad wasnt such a-oh dear."

"I think we found Razor Squad." Garrus said as 4 heavies came out of the lift.

"Take cover!" With the whole team concentrated on different ones at a time, they took them down fairly quick.

"Good work!" Selena praised as they stood up hoping that that was the last of them for a while.

Selena motioned for them to follow as she moved forward. The next room was even more archives. At this point Selena had James and Garrus with her while the others were on the catwalks above. Selena walked into one of the archives and found one on when she became a spectre. She stood there watching it for a while wondering where those days had gone. She decided they needed to move. She countinued til she reached a door with a scanner. "Authorization needed." A robotic voice said. It started scanning her. "Welcome Spectre." Selena smiled as they walked through.

They started through the hallway but the vaults shields activated, sealing them in.

"Brooks? We're in need of a little help."

No answer.

"In trouble Commander?"

"You..."

It was the frickin clone.

"Oh you seem to be in trouble. You're trapped in the vaults. Like I care. I have someone for you to meet." The clone stepped aside, revealing Brooks.

"Brooks?!"

"Sorry Shepard its just not working out."

"Aw man, the hottie is bad." James said. Everyone turned to look at him. "What?" Selena held her hand up.

"Why did you lie to us...to me?" Selena asked, thoroughly pissed.

"Well, you see I was the one who put together all the dossiers for your little mission with the Collectors. Then I left the Illusive Man after he started to become an indoctrinated fool. Matter of fact I was the one that activated your clone. I like this business better. Tricking you was the icing on the cake."

"I will kill you, cut your head off and mount it in the CIC!"

"That's a little hard to do when you are trapped in there."

"Ill mount your head next to hers."

"I dont believe you, let alone am I scared of you."

"You should be."

The clone turned around and started walking away, but stopped and turned back around.

"I should go." It said taunting her.

As they walked away Selena looked stunned. "I should go, I SHOULD go, I should GO, do I really sound like that?"

Garrus shook his head. "Yes, yes you do."

Selena just kept going over it over and over. "Commander dont you think we should be more worried about our current situation?"

That seemd to snap her out of it. "Oh right. Glyph?"

"Yes Commander?"

"Get us outta here!"

"As you wish."


	19. The Clone Wars

Chapter 19●The Clone Wars

"Ive got room for Shepard plus two!" Joker said as he arrived in a skycar.

The whole crew was standing in a straight line waiting to be picked.

"Garrus." Selena smiled as he walked over by her side.

"James."

"I wanted to go." Liara said as she pouted.

"Sorry guys. Id bring everybody again if we had the room. Be waiting for our call."

Everyone saluted. "Aye Aye."

Selena, Garrus and James jumped in the skycar. "Go Joker!" Selena commanded.

"We're losing my ship!" Joker exclaimed.

"Im sorry...your ship? Im the Commander." Selena retaliated.

"Im the pilot!" Joker yelled.

"I don't have time for this. Hurry up!"

Joker groaned and put the pedal to the metal, making the skycar go as fast as possible.

"There she is. We better make it in time. I just got her back, I'm not losing her again."

"Ill get you as close as I can." Joker said.

Selena and her squad got off the skycar. Selena had never felt more nervous. She was visibly shaking. She wanted this to be over.

"Lets go."

"Two snipers and two assault troopers." With all three of them they dropped them quickly.

"Theres a ladder over here, lets go." They took the ladder down having to take cover immediately due to heavies coming their way. It didn't take them long to take them out.

"Come on, only a little farther."

They continued to advance on the intruders. Within minutes they were heading up the ramp to board the Normandy.

Half way up the ramp they run into Traynor.

"How could you do that?!"

Selena stopped and looked at Traynor.

"Umm...do what?"

"You fired me!"

Selena held her head in her hand.

"Okay to make this very clear, that was not me. That was my clone that Cerberus made while they rebuilt me, it has been activated and now is trying to steal the Normandy."

"Well thats the worst excuse I've ever heard!"

"Look, its not an excuse and I dont have time for this!"

Just then everyone lost their balance. The Normandy was taking off.

"Crap!" Selena ran to the door only to find it locked.

"Traynor is there any other way to get in there?"

"There's the emergency hatch but its only made to be opened from the inside."

Selena knew that was it. The Normandy was going to be gone.

Traynor held up her toothbrush.

"I may have an idea."

A few minutes later Selena and the crew were crawling through the hatch. "If anyone ever told me that a toothbrush would save my ship...I'd never believe them, but apparently its true!"

Selema busted the grate off the hatch with her foot only to find out they had 3 heavies looking at them.

"Uh-oh."

They all scurried into what little cover they had. "Finally!" James yelled.

"Finally what?" Selena asked as she took out a mercenary.

"Ive always wanted to have a fight in here."

"Well this is your big day then!" Selena yelled over gunfire.

2 heavies were down. They had 1 heavy and 2 assault troopers left.

Within moments it was over...for now.

"What was that?" Selena asked.

"What was what?"

'Squeak!'

"There it was again!"

Selena walked over to a garbage bin.

"Oh that is not okay!" There in a bin was all of Selena's things from her quarters, including her hamster.

"You can dump my models but you dont dump my hamster!"

"You think the Commander will ever care about us this much?" James asked Garrus.

"Well...I know she does me..dont know about you."

"Oh...thanks a lot Scars."

"No problem."

"I was being sarcastic."

"I know."

Garrus walked away to go hit the button for the elevator.

"Are we ready for this?" Selena asked.

"You know me, I'll always walk into hell with you."

James nodded. "Me too."

"Alright then, let's go."

"This is gonna be fun."

The elevator descended. Selena knew what was on the other side. She wasnt scared for herself, she was scared for Garrus. Even though it wasn't even her priority right now,all she could think about was her and Cass that day. She couldn't shake it, and she knew after this that she had to tell Garrus.

She hope everyone else was ready because she sure as hell wasnt.

The elevator doors opened and she saw the clone. All decked out in heavy armor. Across from the clone stood brooks and a few CAT6 mercs. She had to plan a very quick strategy.

'Take down the mercs, take down the clone, take down brooks.'

"Lets go pay 'myself' a visit."

"Hey copy cat! Miss me?"

They immediately started shooting at them. "Take out the mercs first." The squad nodded and assumed their positions. "Mercs are down!" James informed her.

"Good work!"

"Get the clone!"

Just as she went to change cover the clone came up behind her.

Selena blocked its attack with her melee. The sizzling of the two omni blades hitting each other getting louder by the second. Selena pushed back til the clone was on its butt.

Brooks took a shot at Selena while she was standing over her clone. She hit her in her shoulder.

"Lena!" Garrus ran over to her and shot at Brooks.

The clone was still laying on the ground, selena stradling it, making it impossible to move very far. Brooks took another shot at Selena which made her fall over. The clone stood up and ran to cover to heal.

"Lena, are you okay?" Garrus asked as he helped her up.

"Yeah I'm fine. Didn't hit anywhere that it could pierce through. Garrrus and James, focus on Brooks. Ill take care of the clone.

"Lena I do-"

"Trust me."

Garrus nodded and did as he was told.

The clone had just used its last medi-gel. It was going to be easier now.

Selena was in the middle of the cargo bay when she heard boots running after her, she knew what it was.

"Come get me!" Selena yelled as she stood up, releasing her omni-blade.

They started fighting. Trying to keep omni blades away from each other.

The end of the cargo bay was open from Cortez and Joker earlier. She was watching as they kept getting closer to the edge. They both slipped and were hanging off the edge.

Selena could see Brooks standing by the crates hand cuffed with James standing next to her. Garrus came over and pulled her up.

"If you were worth it I'd save you." Selena said to the clone.

"I dont want to survive anyway." With that the clone let go and fell to its death.

Selena ignored what happened, not really caring. "You got Brooks. Good work!"

"I didnt want to kill you. I just wanted to save the clone."

"Why would I believe that lie? Id rather see you rot in prison."

"You'll miss me."

Little did they know Brooks was hacking the cuffs. She ran to try to escape. Selena drew her pistol and shot her, killing her.

"Not at this distance I wont."

"Are you okay?" Garrus asked again.

"Yeah. Im just ready to be out of here and never think about that damn clone again. I just want to take a frickin vacation."

"Hmm. Maybe I can arrange that."

"You really think so?"

"Sure. Where do you want to go?"

"Somewhere warm and sunny, like home."

"I think I can do that."

Selena and Garrus were hand in hand walking back to the elevator.

"Time to clean up and go have a party."

"Sounds good to me."

As soon as they were in the elevator Garrus kissed her.

"Ah eww! Seriously Lola get a room!" James yelled as the doors closed.


	20. Date Night

Chapter 20●Date Night

A/N-The Citadel dates and party is finally starting. More to come soon! Please R&R!-

Selena walked out of her bedroom in her apartment and stretched from head to toe, enjoying the feeling of the wood floors under her feet.

"Good morning Lena." She felt two 3 taloned hands go around her waist.

"Good morning to you to,my Archangel." She smiled as his grip got tighter around her waist, like if he let go she would be gone.

"Whats the matter?" Selena asked. She could feel the emotions pouring off of him.

"Nothing." He took a breath. "Why?"

Selena turned around to face him. "Garrus, you know you cant lie to me. I see through you way to easily."

He took a deep breath,pausing before letting it out. "I just cant help thinking about the war. We're here, planning a party and people are out there fighting for their lives."

Selena looked up at him. "Garrus, you know as much as I do that we all try to save everyone...but it cant be done. We haven't had shore leave since fighting off Saren and I think we really deserve it. I think people can deal with it without us for maybe a week. We cant fight if we're too run down to do anything."

Garrus shook his head in understanding. "I see where you're coming from. I understand all that but sometimes it slips my mind way too easily."

Selena chuckled. She sat down and motioned for him to sit down. "We all know how that goes. You just need to stop worrying for one week and just think about yourself, and you and me...our cross species liason."

Garrus chuckled at her use of his saying from their reunion.

"Come on. Let me go get changed and then we can go do something. Hows that sound?"

Garrus nodded. "That sounds nice actually."

Selena ran up the stairs to her...well their bedroom. She loved the sound of that. She went through her closet, looking for something to wear that wasnt to dressy but might make an...impression.

"Aha!" She found the dress Kasumi had gotten her. It was all leather and a slight bit uncomfortable but it wasnt going to get any better until she actually wore it.

She threw the dress and heels on and ran over to the vanity. She did her make up quickly and ran out of their room, half way tripping down the stairs.

"Hey Le...wow..."

Selena laughed. "Like it?"

Garrus scoffed. "Like it? I love it."

Garrus ran his talons through her hair, making it a mess again but she didnt really care.

"You may not have a human fetish but I think you might have a hair fetish."

Garrus immediately stopped. "Im sorry...I'll stop."

"No! No...that's not what I meant. I was just joking. It think its cute."

Garrus chuckled and took her hand. "How about we go on our date?"

"Sounds great."

Selena laid her head on his shoulder as they walked out, feeling at peace for the first time in years.


	21. Don't Hold Back

Chapter 21●Don't Hold Back

A/N-All dialog while they are sitting at the bar is in game dialog the rest is partially in game dialog.-

"Is that supposed to melt a girls heart?"

"No, but this voice is."

He paused and she smiled.

"The names Garrus Vakarian, codename Archangel. All around Turian bad boy and dispenser of Justice in an unjust galaxy."

There was a brief pause and she wondered is she was going to have to start her part early until he spoke up.

"Also I kill reapers on the side. And you are?"

"Commander Selena Shepard. Alliance Navy."

"Shepard huh? I may have heard a few things about you."

"Oh? Flatter me."

"Word is you're smart. Sexy. A wicked shot. Also you kill reapers on the side too."

"Uh-huh. And do most girls fall for that?"

"Well sure. This voice and um...um. Im running out of banter here Lena."

"Make it up. Remember, we just met." She shifted in her seat, eager to see where this would go.

Garrus looked at the dance floor and Selena saw him. She had a feeling he was going to drag her out there. That part didnt amuse her.

"Right."

He got up and grabbed her hand.

"What are you doing?" She asked suddenly ready to leave.

"Come on, it'll be fun!"

Her eyes had to be bigger than her head at this point.

"No..no...no!"

Next thing she knew she was being spun onto the dance floor.

"You're gonna pay for this later."

He started moving and she was tripping over her own feet.

"Promises, promises."

"Ive been taking lessons on the side." He said as he spun her. She immediately went back into his arms, knowing if she tried to do it herself she would be on her butt.

"While I stand here with none."

She finally started to catch the rythm. It was becoming a little easier.

"Now you're getting it."

They moved on the dance floor like water. It was actually really fun now, she did have to admit that...though she wouldn't really.

They spun to a stop and she found the perfect oppurtunity to do her own move.

As they spun she lifted her leg around his hip. He leaned back taking her with him and eliciting gasps from the crowd.

They kept on dancing like they had both practiced this for weeks. She saw James out of the corner of her eye, but she didnt pay any attention to him. She was to concerned with the task at hand.

They stopped and he let her go when he spun her, leading her away from him. While she could have walked back over, she knew it was part of the dance routine. So instead she opted for beckoning him over, making people watch more intently. She didnt know if they were enjoying watching them dance or if they were watching because well...they were a Turian and Human couple...that was unheard of.

They continued dancing.

'One foot in front of the other.' She told herself.

They suddenly stopped again but this time the music was coming to an end, as was their dance.

He dipped her,exposing her neck. Also exposing her bite mark from Garrus when he bit her. Turians bit their mates fir dominance, he had just forgotten she wasn't Turia that day.

"You think a girl would fall for that?" Garrus asked.

She wanted to slap him upside the head. 'Who wouldn't!' She thought.

"Yes!"

He lifted her back up.

"So...just to clarify, what exactly are we?" Selena asked. She was curious about what he thought they were.

"We're mates. Always lovers, always together. There are no secrets between mates."

Selena stopped breathing. 'Did he know?'

Either way she was tired of keeping secrets. She needed to let go of the consequences and do it, just not now. The place was to public and she didnt want to make a scene. She would tell him when they went back to the apartment. It was only fair to him to wait.

"Garrus, we need to go back to the apartment." She didnt want him to think she was using him, that was the last thing she wanted.

"Why? Whats wrong?"

"Theres something I have to tell you...in private."

"Umm...okay." She knew she had made him nervous with that last sentence.

They made their way back to the apartment, she was getting nervous...but it had to be done.

They entered the apartment. "Sit down."

She motioned to the couch. She sat down across from him. 'Here goes nothing.' She thought.

"Garrus please dont hate me."

"Why would I hate you?"

"Because of something I did."

Garrus looked puzzled.

"What are you talking about?"

"It had never ever been my intention but I...kissed Cass."

Garrus went still...very still.

"Garrus Im so sorry. I didnt want to. He came onto me but it was my own fault. I shouldn't have gone let alone kept it from you." She paused to take a breath. "When you said 'no secrets between mates' it made me realize what I've done."

Garrus still sat still.

"Garrus please..."

With that Garrus got up and left the apartment. Selena sat on the couch and cried. She wanted to wait to tell him, but it appeared she waited to long.

A/N-Wow! So...who thinks they can make it work? Find out later as I update! Thanks for the Reviews, favs and follows. I really appreciate them. Once again, I apologize for any horrible grammar.-


	22. When All Seems Lost

Chapter 22●When All Seems Lost

A/N-So heres a little Liara & Selena angst. I promise that Garrus will be back in the next chapter.-

Selena drew her legs up underneath her and cried. She couldn't believe the mess she had made, it was all her fault. She heard a knock on her door but she ignored it. She really didnt want to deal with people right now. There was another knock.

"Seriously?! Who is it and what do you want?"

"Its Liara."

Selena lifted her head. Liara was who she needed right now. She had seen her at her weakest and today was one of those days.

"The doors unlocked."

Liara came around the corner and immediately ran to Selena. She had black mascara running down her face from crying and she probably looked like the bride of Frankenstein.

"Goddess Lena,whats wrong?

Selena sniffed.

"I...I pushed Garrus away."

Liara shook her head and pulled Selena closer to her.

"What happened?"

"I kissed Cass 2 weeks ago and just now told Garrus. He'll never want anything to do with me now. I lied and I cheated."

"Goddess...all you did was kiss him. Thats not cheating."

"By human standards it is. Ugh! Im such a tramp."

Liara pulled Selena to her tighter.

"You're not a tramp Lena. Over time he'll come to terms."

Selena pulled out of Liara's grasp.

"Do you not understand?! Im the one that did wrong! I kissed Cass...and I liked it!"

Liara's eyes got bigger. "That changes things."

"You think!"

"Your main thing now, is figuring out which one you love more."

"Garrus! I love Garrus!"

"Then why did you do it?"

Selena started turning red, not out of embarrassment but anger.

"I dont know! I had just gone to find him. I wanted to figure out...something...and he kissed me!"

"Then its not your fault."

"Well yeah it is! I could have pushed him away and left. I stayed and let him kiss me, let him push me against a pole so I had to stay. I could have stopped him...but I didn't. Now I have to fix things between me and Garrus."

"Lena?"

"What?"

"Id go change and wash up first."

She turned around and saw herself in the mirror. She had black make up streaks down her face and her hair was...there...Needless to say she looked like someone threw her in the washing machine on heavy duty.

"Ill be back." She didnt feel good or at ease or happy but she felt a little better getting her anger out. Maybe that was Liara's plan. She was so smart.

Selena rifled through her closet and grabbed a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She grabbed her combat boots out of the bathroom and started back down stairs.

"I cant say I'm ready but I have to. I love him to much to let go."

"Then don't. Ill come with you if itll make you feel better."

"That'd be great. Might help some."

Selena tromped towards the door Liara close behind. She wasnt ready but it had to be done. 'Here goes nothing.' She thought before she went out the door.


	23. Love Conquers All

Chapter 23●Love Conquers All

A/N-Hope everyone is enjoying! It probably went better than what most of you were expecting but come on...its Garrus. Hes to sweet! Just keep in mind...theres going to be a big surprise within the next 2 or 3 chapters. Please R&R!-

Selena and Liara were walking through the Citadel to, by chance, find Garrus. Her omni tool pinged, she didnt have time for it but she checked it anyway, thinking it might be Garrus. The note read:

Dear Selena,

I just met you yet feel that I have known you for years. I want to see you again. What we experienced was...well...nice. I know you said that you love Garrus more but maybe we can atleast be friends. Meet me at the silversun strip. Ill be waiting.

Best Regards,

Cass

Selena sat down on the bench and stared at the message. She was trying to make things right with Garrus and get rid of Cass...now he wanted to be in her life. How was that going to work? She didnt even want him in her life right now, so she decided to send a message back.

Dear Cass,

I know you mean well but I cant have you in my life. I dont want to hurt you but its my only option. What happened between us has ruined my relationship with Garrus and I'm to busy trying to fix it. I dont have time to sit and talk and we'll only be on the Citadel a few more days. I wont have time. Im sorry but it just cant be.

Selena

She was afraid of hurting him but she couldn't do it. If she was even able to get Garrus back he would have to many doubts that they couldnt get along together anymore.

"Lena? What is it?" Liara asked.

"Oh its nothing. Lets get back to finding Garrus."

Just then something clicked. "Liara! Wheres the one place you can always find Garrus?"

"The Main Battery!" They said in unison as they ran towards the docking bay. She had to make things right...if he would even take her back.

They boarded the Normandy and it was oddly quiet. She knew there was no one aboard but being so used to so much noise it was...disquieting.

She ran to the elevator. "I know you came to be with me but I think I need to do this on my own. I hope you understand." Selena told Liara. She didn't want to hurt someone elses feelings but she needed to be alone for this.

"I completely understand. Ill be here when you're finished."

Selena smiled. "Thanks Liara. You're the best." Selena hit the button for the Crew Deck and tapped her foot, waiting on the elevator was...horrible. Especially when you're in a hurry.

The elevator doors opened and she couldn't have been happier to get off.

The Main Battery door was locked. She knew he was in there and she also knew he wouldn't open it for her right now. She had to get EDI to override it.

"EDI? Override the lock to the Main Battery."

"Officer Vakarian has asked me not to let any-"

"EDI, this is my ship. I won't be second guessed in my ship, by my ship. Now open the door."

"Yes Commander."

The doors slid open moments later. There sat Garrus on his cot with his head in his hands. He didnt seem to notice the door had opened but she also wasnt sure he would notice much anyways, there was an empty bottle of Turian brandy beside him. He was most likely very drunk.

"Garrus?" He lifted his head at her voice.

"What do you want?" He said, slurring the whole time.

"I want to apologize, do anything to make you see that I woukd take it all back if I could."

"Theres nothing you can say to make me think otherwise. If you want to be with a better Turian, go on ahead. I wont stop you."

"Garrus that's just it! I dont want to be with another Turian...I want you."

"You have a funny way of showing it."

"I know." She got down on her knees and took his head in her hands. "Ive done so much wrong in this world...and this was one of my worst ones. I wish I had never done it. If it means losing you, I'd rather kill myself than lose you."

"Don't!" Garrus grabbed her shoulder. "Don't you dare even think about killing yourself."

"I know you won't accept me back yet...but I atleast want to know that we can maybe work things out and see where it goes all over again. Im not expecting you to say yes but I want that one chance that we can work it out."

Garrus hung his head and shook his head with a breathy laugh. "Yeah. We can try. Ill give you another chance."

Selena wrapped her arms around his neck. "I wont fail you...I promise. This weekend is the party, we can see about trying to work things out before then. At least a little bit."

He gave her the Turian equivalent of a grin. "We will sure try."

"Thanks. Now how about I go get you a glass of water. You're going to have a heck of a headache in the morning if not."

"That might be a good idea."

She left the room to go get some water. She hoped it wasnt just the alcohol talking but being Garrus she doubted it. She was just happy they had a chance. Now to see how that goes.


	24. Going Well? No Not Really

Chapter 24●Going Well? No Not Really...

Selena was much more chipper. She was excited to start patching things up with Garrus. She had just finished talking to some of the crew. She couldn't find Garrus anywhere and figured he was still on the Normandy. Once she boarded the Normandy and opened the door to the Main Battery...nothing. He wasn't there.

"EDI? Locate Officer Vakarian for me."

A few moments later the AI answered. "I cannot find him. Would you like me to look again?"

"No EDI. Thanks though."

Selena was starting to worry. Where had he gone. She had checked all the restraunts and all of his favorite shops and he wasn't there, nor had he been there.

She brought up her omni tool and pinged Liara.

Liara,

Can't find Garrus. Im going to need your help.

Lena

She hoped she'd get it quick. They were on a search for him all over again. 'Didnt we do this yesterday?' She thought.

Selena hurried on her way to the apartment, she told Liara that she would meet her there. It took her about 15 minutes but hey she made it.

"Liara, thanks for coming. Im gonna need your help...again."

"Thats okay Lena,I understand. Do you have any idea where he may have gone?"

"None."

"So we start from scratch again?"

GARRUS POV

Garrus woke up, his head was pounding. He had drank a whole bottle of Turian brandy. He slowly got out of bed, hissing as the motion sensored lights came on. He sat there for a moment.

"Selena..." He began to remember the night before.

"I can't. I can't believe you!" He shouted.

No one was on the Normandy so he stomped out of the Main Battery not bothering to grab anything to drink or eat. He took the elevator down to engineering. He sat in the room with the drive core just listening to the hum, it always soothed him...but not today.

"Why did you have to do this Lena?!" He shouted. "I trusted you and you let me down...I can never trust you...never..."

"You said you loved me but then you go and sleep with another Turian. You certaintly have a funny way of showing your love...if you even have any."

"I love you Lena but you apparently dont love me." He wanted to say everything to her face...but he sat here...alone.


	25. Face Your Fate

Chapter 25●Face Your Fate

Selena and Liara had given up with looking for Garrus. It seemed hopeless. They were sitting in the Zakera Cafe, it was the closest place to go sit.

"We can still keep looking." Liara said, genuinely concerned about her.

"Its no use. We've loo-" Selena cut her sentence short.

"We didnt check the rest of the Normandy. Oh spirits he had been drunk! Where is he?" She had been around Garrus and just Turians in general to long, using the phrase 'oh spirits'...classic Turian.

Selena got up and ran in the direction of the Normandy. All she could hope was that he was there somewhere. She ran herself sick and finally reached the Normandy. She boarded and huffed and puffed. She was completely out of breath.

"Hes not on the crew deck,he wouldn't be in my quarters...hes not down there is he?"

She ran to the elevator and practically punched the button for engineering. She was still beyond mad at herself. The elevator pinged and she ran off of it like someone shot her.

"Garrus?"

She heard a groan.

"Garrus? Are you down here?"

Still no answer. Just grunts and groans.

Selena walked a little farther and found him laying on the floor, face down. She knelt down and nudged him, trying to wake him up.

"Garrus?"

He jumped and got on his knees, ready to draw his gun.

"Im sorry, I didnt mean to startle you."

"What the hell do you want?"

Selena frowned.

"What are you talking about?"

Garrus rolled his eyes.

"What do you mean 'what are you talking about?'" He mocked her. "You came to me...when I was drunk and had the audacity to ask me if we could work things out. I was drunk! I didnt really know what was going on. I didnt realize what had happened. When I woke up I regretted it. If this is what you were always planning on doing I wish you had never come into my life!"

"Gar- Selena started but he interrupted her.

"No! Not this time. I won't have it! You slept with another Turian! Why would you do that?"

Selena gasped.

"I did not sleep with him! It was only a kiss, nothing more."

Garrus scoffed.

"I couldn't believe you before, how can I believe you now?"

"I-Im telling the truth. I waited to tell you for your own good. I didnt want you to get hurt or even killed in the fight. I just wanted to wait."

Garrus threw his hands up in the air.

"You waited to long." His voice was stone cold. "Goodbye Selena...wish I'd never known you."

Selena opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. She didnt know what to say. She watched him walk away from her and realized how horribly she had screwed up. She all of the sudden got angry.

"Fine! You want to think I slept with him. Maybe I will!"

She brought up her omni tool as she stomped towards the elevator.

Cass,

I was wrong to say what I did. I like you. Maybe we can put what I said behind me. Can we meet at the café?

Selena

She hoped that she could rekindle what she had said. She did really like him she just never told anyone else and didnt really want to think of it herself. She decided now that Garrus didnt want to be in her life, she needed Cass. Maybe it was a bad idea but its obvious that Garrus doesn't want her anymore.

A few moments later her omni tool pinged.

Selena,

That sounds great! Id love to meet up with you again. When can we meet?

Cass

Selena immediately pinged him back.

Cass,

We can meet in 25 minutes. So long as that works for you.

Selena

She got to the elevator and hit the button for the CIC.

"You don't want me anymore, I'll go to a man that will and does." She said into the silence. Wishing she could say it to his face.

"Lets do this." Selena said as she walked off the elevator.

Her omni tool pinged moments later.

Selena,

That works great. See you then!

Cass

She had to admit, she was excited to see him.

"Nows the time to test the theory of just how much you like him Selena." She told herself.

"Lets go have another date with a Turian."

A/N-Well, next chapter up! Maybe it seems like she got over Garrus to fast but thats not the case. Itll all come out in the woodwork! Hope you're enjoying and please continue to R&R!


	26. To Love Another

Chapter 26●To Love Another

A/N-Once again parts of Selena's past are mentioned in this chapter. My reason for having something of that scale happen to her was well...because tnats what I wanted. A bad past. That would explain being a renegade. Thanks for reading and R&R!-

"Hey Cass." Selena greeted him as he sat down in the chair across from her.

"How have you been?" He asked.

She had never noticed how deep and...sexy...his voice was, until now.

"Ive been better. You?" Selena asked.

"Alright. Whats been going on? I can tell that something is...off."

Selena intertwined her hands and stared at the table. Should she just tell him that she and Garrus were no more or just tell him that things were complicated...or should she just say, I'm single! She was so confused right now.

"Nothing much."

Cass looked her up and down and she couldn't tell if he could tell if she was lying or if he was checking her out. She had to admit...she liked him a lot more than she realized.

"Nothing much. Really?" He said, disbelieving.

"Yeah. Not much. Really. Im ok." She knew that she had made a mistake when she took a breath in between her last two words. He had been around her enough to pick up on habits. He knew she was lying.

"Would you mind if we went to a more private place to talk? I have an apartment here on the Citadel."

She was suprised. He just asked her to come to his apartment...where the night was going to go she wasnt sure, but it intrigued her.

"Sure. I'll follow you."

Selena turned around and immediately held her breath. There stood Garrus right behind her. He looked...angry. 'Does he still have feelings for me?' She asked herself.

Cass saw him and they both started going after each other.

"Cass no!" She grabbed his arm but he just kept walking.

"Garrus!" She yelled.

Garrus was the first one to strike, hitting Cass on the left side of his face. Cass grunted but went right back for Garrus.

'I have to stop them! But how?' Questions were going through her head so quick she couldn't find answers for them.

Selena walked over and stepped right in between them. They had no choice to stop, otherwise they would hit her. "If either of you hit me I will castrate you."

"Garrus, why did you come back? I thought you wanted no part of me." She was mad and they could both tell.

"I didn't come back for you! I came to eat and saw you two together..." He immediately stopped. He had just sold himself out.

"You're jealous? Thats really mature. Say you want no part of me and then get jealous when I'm with someone else. I can see right through you. I know when you're lying, angry, sad, happy and every other emotion, especially jealousy."

Garrus growled. "So you're taking his side?"

"Im not taking anyone's side. You need to calm down!"

"Thats it! Im out of here!"

With that Garrus stomped off. Never looking behind him.

"Cass are you okay?"

He shook his head. "Of course. We're built and bred for that you know."

"I know. That doesnt mean I can't worry. So now you know what was going on. Garrus and I...broke up."

"It doesnt seem to be bothering you? We're you unhappy?"

He had just asked a question she couldn't answer. Had she neen unhappy but just didn't realize it? Had she ever really loved him? Now she had doubts.

"I honestly don't know." A tear cascaded down her cheek.

Cass wiped her tears away.

"How about we go to my apartment."

She sniffed. "That sounds better than standing in the open. After that stunt we're getting some odd looks." She laughed.

"Follow me." For the first time he held her hand and she held his. She didn't know what she felt but she felt...a spark.

She followed behind him like a little puppy dog. She was more than ready to get to his apartment. It was private and all the weird looks they were getting had set her on edge.

"Here we are."

He opened the door and her mouth hung open. It looked like a mansion. It had an earthy vibe to it from the fact of it looked like a regular house from earth. No futuristic look...it was...rustic.

"This view is...beautiful."

Cass looked down at her. "Yes it is." She knew he wasn't talking about the apartment. The front window over looked the presidium, it was gorgeous.

"How did you afford this?"

He chuckled. "Im a spectre remember."

"That explains it."

"Please sit. Just pick a spot. Would you like something to drink?"

"Do you have any alcohol?"

"I have wine."

"Awesome, that works."

Right now she wanted to chug the whole bottle. Although she decided against that.

"Here you are." He handed her the glass.

"Thanks. I still can't get over this place."

He chuckled. "Im glad you like it. Ive had this place for 12 years."

"12 years? How old are you then? If you dont mind me asking."

"Not at all. We might as well get to know each other better. Im 34."

"You were 21 when you became a spectre?"

"You were 29."

"Fair point."

"Where did you come from? I mean were you born on Palaven or not?"

"Oh umm yes. I was. My family and I kind of had a rough start. We made it though."

"Your parents must be proud."

He hung his head. "My parents are...dead. They died not long after I left for spectre training."

"I'm sorry."

"Its okay. You didn't know."

"You say my parents would have been proud what about yours? You're the savior of the Citadel, you defeated Saren and are defeating the Reapers. Plus you're the Commander of the Normandy."

"I don't know where my parents are. My Mom left me alone in our apartment when I was 8, she never told me what happened to Dad. I made a living off of food from dumpster and water when it rained. I didnt know just how cruel the world was until I was...molested at a casino by a drunk old man. I was scared and all I could do was scream. I dont really remember any more than that. I was a just a brat running in the streets...I often wonder...how I got here." Her last few words were broken by sobs.

"Im sorry, I'm sorry. Come here."

He moved closer to her and she buried her face in his neck and cried. He held her tighter the more she cried.

Selena finally came to her senses and stopped crying. She pulled back from his neck and wiped at his shirt where her head had been. "Sorry."

He shook his head. "Don't be."

She moved back to look him in the eyes. "I didnt mean to give you a sob story."

"You didnt. Its alright."

She had no time to think it through before she had her lips on his. He apparently didn't care to push her away. After a few moments she wasnt sure how but they made it to the bed. He laid her down.

"You're so beautiful."

Her hair laid around her head in a heap of black curls. She turned red from embarrassment.

"Just come here will you."

She reached out for him and pulled him onto the bed. "You're mine now." She said, being possessive.

"I have no problem with that."


	27. When Did This Happen?

Chapter 27●When Did This Happen?

"Good Morning."

Selena opened her eyes to two green ones looking at her. She stretched.

"Good Morning." She responded.

She felt the best she had in years.

"Do you want some breakfast?"

"That'd be-whoa."

Selena suddenly didn't feel so good. She felt like she was going to be sick.

"Selena are you okay?"

"No. Wheres the bathroom?"

"Right off to the left."

She jumped out of the bed, running towards the bathroom. She just barely made it to the toilet before she threw up, luckily she was quick. Cass came around the corner.

"Selena? You okay?"

She was leaning over the toilet puking. 'Yeah I'm fine...I just decided I needed to puke.'

She nodded no with a groan.

Cass came over and held her hair away from her face.

After a few moments she finally felt like she could move and not puke. She suddenly had horrible stomach pains.

"Dear Lord it feels like someone just stabbed me!" She said holding her stomach.

Cass held onto her. "You need a doctor."

"Damn!" She screamed as the pain began again. "Call Doctor Chakwas."

A few minutes later Cass came back into the bathroom.

"She said to meet her at Huerta."

"Then we better hurry. I think my stomach is going to explode!" She said in pain.

"Here, let me help." He swept her off her feet and carried her.

"You don't have to do this."

"I know. You're hurting, you deserve it."

"I can take care of myself."

He shook his head. "I know you can...but how could you have walked all the way to the elevator and then walked through Huerta in the condition you're in. From what I know about human illnesses it might be appendicitis."

"Thats exactly what I was think-ow!"

Cass stopped to press the button for the elevator, trying his hardest not to accidentally drop her. "We're almost there."

"Im glad. Its getting worse."

"Im hurrying."

She grabbed her stomach.

"I know. Its not your fault."

"Selena! Your Cass I presume? Whats wrong?"

"Yes I'm Cass. We're not sure but we need your help."

"Follow me and we will check her out."

Cass carried her into the room and laid her down on the table.

"Can we hurry up and solve this problem!"

Selena's back bowed off the bed as she writhed in pain.

"Okay, calm down Selena. You're obviously in pain so we'll give you some morphine. I can't examine you if you can't hold still."

"Cass, I dont mind to be rude dear but for this part of the exam would you mind leaving the room?" Karin asked.

"Oh. Of course not."

"You'll be notified as soon as shes done."

He nodded. "Thanks."

As soon as Cass left the room Karin started asking questions.

"Where exactly is the pain located?"

She ran her hand across her waist line.

"All across here and no its not horrible menstrual cramps."

"Okay. When did it start?"

"Just this morning."

"Please dont think I'm being weird but for your well being I have to ask, are you sexually active? And when was the last time you were...active?"

"Umm...yes and this morning."

Karin seemed to have an idea of what it was.

"We need to do an ultra sound, immediately."

"Okay." At this point Selena was willing to do anything to get rid of the pain or figure out why she had these pains.

A few moments later Selena was laying on yet another table but this time without a shirt.

"Found anything?"

Karin suddenly went still, mouth agape and gasped.

"What's wrong?" She didn't need to see something like that when a doctor was looking at the inside of her.

"Well the pain is understandable now. You're 2 weeks pregnant...with a Turians child. Thats...impossible. The pain is from the fetus really being incompatible with your body. This is remarkable."

Selena didnt know what to say. "So...Im pregnant from Garrus. How? I thought we were incompatible that way."

"You are. It somehow happened. Congratulations Selena."

Selena sat there dumbfounded. Now not only did she have problems with Garrus she was pregnant with their child and he wouldn't talk to her. They had to go back to the fight in 4 days. There was no way Hackett or Anderson would let her. As soon as Karin would send out a report for another appointment in 6 weeks news would get out and it would be all over the news that the great Selena Shepard was pregnant. "What do I do?" She asked as she rubbed her stomach.


	28. Surprise!

Chapter 28●Suprise!

"Selena? Are you alright?" Karin asked.

She had been sitting there staring off into nowhere for God knows how long.

"Umm...no not really. Can I tell you something and trust you not to tell anyone else?"

"Of course. What is it?"

"About a month ago I had gone to find Cass. I wanted to get an answer from him. We kissed." Karin gasped but Selena held her hand up. "Let me finish."

"I didnt tell Garrus for weeks that it had happened and I really screwed up. I told him and he ran and I havent really talked to him since. Now I have another problem." Karin nodded for her to continue. "Garrus wont talk to me, I don't know how I'm going to tell him about the baby and he really wont listen to reason with what happened now...I slept with Cass." Karin looked like she just had a heart attack.

"Selena..."

"Go ahead. Tell me all the things I did wrong. I know I did wrong but now I'm not sure how to fix it."

"Well...you have to be honest with him. Dont keep secrets like before. Try to explain what happened and how it happened and then tell him about the baby. He probably won't trust you or take you back right away or at all but he needs to know. He needs to know that he's the one you truly love, you just have to find a way to prove it. You slept with another man...thats going to be hard. But you have to try."

"I know. I regret what I did. I like Cass but...I truly love Garrus. I don't know why I did that."

Karin grabbed her shoulders and hugged her.

"You're only human. You make mistakes...it isn't something that can be helped. Some things we shouldn't do but like what happened with you and Cass, it was spur of the moment, right?"

Selena nodded. "Yeah. We had been talking about my past and I lost it and started crying. He grabbed me and hugged me. I dont know what happened but I instigated it. I was blind as to what I was doing. I wouldn't tell him that I regret it though. I cant hurt another that I love."

"So you do love him?

"I do. But I love Garrus more. I just have to make him see it. Make him listen."

"You always know where I am if you need help."

"Thanks Karin. You always know what to say."

Karin smiled.

"Go. Cass is waiting."

"Right."

Selena put her shirt back on and walked out the door.

Cass jumped out of the chair and walked over to her faster than she could run.

"How are you? Whats wrong? Did she-"

"Woah. Slow down with the questions."

"Right. Sorry. So what is it?"

Selena took a deep breath.

"Im...2 weeks pregnant."


	29. Face Your Fears

Chapter 29●Face Your Fears

"Pregnant...?"

"Yes."

"So...two weeks...that-"

"Its Garrus' Cass." She interrupted. "I'm two weeks pregnant with a Turian's child. I dont know how its possible, it just is. I have to tell him."

"Tell who?"

She became irrate. "Who do you think Casius? I have to let him know." That was the first time she ever used his full name.

"And how do you expect to do that?"

Selena ran it through her head in the little time she had to figure out what she was going to say, and how she was going to say it.

"Cass I..."

"You're going to leave again right? Never see me again...never speak of what happened. Never act like you met me."

She didnt want to just say 'Exactly!' He had just explained exactly what she was going to do and had to do.

'Come on Selena! You fought the collectors with no fear, you can do this.' She told herself.

"Im sorry Cass but I have to go. I have to." She said again. "You won't see me again,I can promise that."

Maybe she had been a little harsh on the last sentence but that was the only way she could say it.

Cass hung his head. "So this is the final goodbye?"

"Yes, it is."

He went to hug her but she pushed him back. "No more. Goodbye Cass."

She walked off towards the elevator, never looking behind her. She was trying to keep from crying but she had to do it, she had to do it for the one she truly loved, Garrus.

"Why did I even start this?" She asked the silence.

"Its my fault I'm in this mess. If it wasn't for my stupid idea I wouldn't have a mountain of problems."

The final realization of what she did to Garrus hit her and she let go of the tears she was trying to hold in. She slid down the elevator wall and buried her head in her hands.

"This is my fault." She told herself out loud.

She heard the ping of the elevator and hurried to get up and tried to compose herself a little bit. People watched her as she came out of the elevator. At this point if someone looked at her wrong she would kill them.

"What are you looking at?"

They all backed off, one murmuring something about her being crazy. She tried to ignore that knowing that she had something that she needed to do.

'How am I even supposed to find him?'

"Liara!"

She brought up her omni tool and pinged Liara.

Liara,

Sorry about this but I need your help again. Ill be waiting on the Normandy. Ill need your Shadow Broker skills.

Selena

She started on her way to the Normandy. She still felt like she could puke but this was for a different reason.

Her omni tool pinged. She stopped to read it.

Selena,

Ill be there soon. I have news for you.

Liara

'Oh no.'

She started running towards the Normandy. She had to hurry. She was worried that the news was about Garrus.

'Please God tell me he didn't get killed.'

She prayed that he was still alive. If he was dead, she would most likely kill herself. If he was...it was her fault.

She arrived at the Normandy. Liara was already there.

"Hey."

"Hey Lena."

Selena saw her holding a data pad and she figured that was the news.

"James just gave this to me. He said Garrus gave it to him." Liara handed her the data pad.

'Im leaving to go to Palaven. At least I can die with honor, as a hero.'

"What have I done?"

"Selena its not your fault."

"Yes it is! I drove him away! Now hes going to get himself killed!" Selena broke down and started crying.

"You didn't know that he'd go this far."

"No I didn't. But that doesn't make what I did okay!"

Selena took a breather to calm down her crying.

"We have to go to Palaven. I have to see him, get him back here. Even if he wont take me back he will at least not kill himself. I have to tell him something."

"What do you have to tell him?"

She knew Liara was trying to help but this wasnt 20 questions time.

"Im pregnant with Garrus' child."


	30. From The Beginning To The End

Chapter 30●From The Beginning To The End

"So what now?" Joker asked.

"I told you twice...we're going to Palaven."

"Why?"

"None of your damn business! You're just the pilot. You go by my rules!"

Liara came over.

"Shes pregnant."

Selena went slack jawed.

"Really?! You had to tell him?"

"My conscious told me to."

"Well keep your conscious quiet."

Liara didnt say anything more. She was so flabbergasted from Selena telling her about her pregnancy that she wanted to just blurt out all the secrets she knew about her...amongst other people.

"Joker, set a course for Palaven...now."

"Yes ma'm. ETA 3 hours."

"Thanks."

Selena told Liara goodbye and went to her cabin. She just wanted to be by herself. She was depressed...it was her own fault.

Selena laid down on her bed and pulled a pillow to her. "Why?" She asked herself. She started crying again.

'"You always knew how to sweet talk a girl." Selena said. "Yeah, I'm good at that." Garrus chuckled. "I love you Garrus." Garrus pulled her to him. "I love you too."'

She had been having flashbacks. Her conscious was being evil. She knew it was necessary, she needed to be shown what she had done. It was all her fault.

Selena shut her eyes for a moment. She slowly drifted off to sleep.

"30 minutes from Palaven Commander."

Selena jumped up.

"What?"

"Sorry Commander were you asleep?"

"Yeah. Its okay. Thanks Joker."

She felt bad for snapping at him earlier.

"Hey Joker?"

"Yes Commander?"

"Im sorry...about earlier."

"Its okay."

Selena smiled though he didn't see it.

"Please Garrus. Be okay." Selena said.

She got up and put her bodysuit on and grabbed her armor. "Please be okay. She whispered again to the silence.


	31. Believe

Chapter 31●Believe

"Cortez bring us in."

"Aye Aye."

Liara came up behind Selena and tapped her shoulder.

"Can I talk to you for a moment?"

"We're kind of in the middle of-"

Liara grabbed her arm and pulled her to the other side of the shuttle.

"Do you know how dangerous this is? You could kill your child."

"Yes Liara, I've thought about that and I don't like the thought of it but...I have to do this."

Liara threw her arms up in the air.

"Fine."

Selena was getting angry.

"Do you not understand what happened? I have to do this."

"Its your own fault you're in this mess!"

Selena groaned.

"You. Are. A. Bitch." Selena said before she grabbed her sub machine gun and jumped off the shuttle.

Selena looked around the base to see if she saw any familiar armor. Nothing.

"Please be alive."

She could here talking but couldn't hear where it was coming from. She made out the last sentence. "Vakarian."

"Garrus!"

Selena ran the way she thought she could hear it from, hoping he was still there.

"Yes sir." She could still hear the talking. It was getting louder.

When she came around the corner she saw him. He hadnt seen her yet and she hoped he would understand.

"Garrus?" Garrus looked over at her and she could tell he was angry.

"What the hell are you doing here?" He walked over to her, she was actually afraid to tell him what happened and what is. 'Ok...I'll tell him about Cass first. Then the hardest part is over, right?'

She kept running it through her head about what would be the best option.

"Garrus you have to understand that its completely over,I dont want him anymore. It was an accident, a huge mistake."

Garrus growled. "You slept with him didnt you? So what you're just coming here to break my heart more."

He grabbed her around her neck just hard enough to hold her and pushed her against the wall.

"Garrus, theres something else I have to tell you."

"What?" He ground out.

"Im pregnant, with your child."

He dropped her and fell to his knees.

"How is that even possible?"

'God what have I done?' She asked herself.

"I dont know. All I know is that even if you wont take me back, please come back for the child. Don't you want her to grow up with a father?"

Selena had started crying. She got down on her knees beside him.

"Please Garrus, I'm so sorry!"

Garrus looked up into her eyes for the first time without anger. He could see the broken woman inside of her. He had been with her as a crew mate and mate that he knew when she was telling the truth. She was telling the truth.

"Please. Its over between me and him, I want you. I dont want anybody else, I want you..."

She buried her head in her hands and cried. She felt a talon on the bottom of her chin. He lifted her head up.

"You mean it? Hes out of your life completely?"

"Yes. Im serious. Please come back. Maybe we can make it work after awhile."

"Ill come back. But its definitely going to take time between us. I have to know you mean what you say."

She was happy he was coming back and sad that it would take that much to get him back.

'What did I do?' She asked herself again.

Garrus held his hand out and pulled her up off the ground.

"You ready to go home?"

"I am home."

"Okay...are you ready to go to the Normandy."

"Yes."

They got back to the shuttle and hopped on. Liara popped her head up and gasped when she saw Garrus with her.

The doors shut and Garrus turned around to face Selena. "So...about the pregnancy."


	32. The Long Ride

Chapter 32●The Long Ride

"What about the pregnancy?" Selena asked upset. She was afraid he was going to say he didnt want it.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"Because I didn't know about it til 2 days ago."

"But you still waited those 2 days?"

Selena was getting angry.

"You left! I couldn't find you to tell you earlier. What did you expect me to do when I screwed up?! It was my fault you left and I had been afraid that it would be my fault that he would grow up without a father. I was terrified of that,it wasn't until Liara gave me the note that you left with James that I knew where you were. You apparently hated me enough and apparently still do."

Garrus walked over to her and grabbed her shoulder, she just shrugged him off. "No!" Selena walked over and sat down.

Liara looked around unsure of what to do now. They were just about back to the Normandy and the awkward silence was getting annoying, she hoped Steven hurried.

"How much longer til we get to the Normandy?" Liara asked Steve.

"Very soon. About 2 minutes."

"Great!" Liara looked over at Selena and Garrus. "They are getting really annoying, being in a confined space theres no where for me to go."

"Hey! I'm here to ya know."

Liara rolled her eyes. "Yeah...yeah...yeah."

Selena and Garrus were sitting on opposite sides of the bench not speaking to each other. Liara could understand why Garrus wouldn't be talking to her but what was Selena's problem? Just this morning she had been talking about just wanting to talk to Garrus, looks like that changed fast.

"We're back on the Normandy."

Everyone rushed off the shuttle except for Garrus.

"Would you like to leave the shuttle Garrus?" Steve asked. He didn't want to be rude but to be honest, he was ready to be rid of them...Shepard had left, but Garrus was still here.

"I'm such an ass."

Steve looked at him confused. "You're an ass? Dont think I'm putting the Commander down but isn't Shepard the one that did wrong?"

"Yeah but I accused her of not telling me earlier. She didn't know earlier plus I left, how was she supposed to."

Steve reluctantly set down beside Garrus. He had to do the right thing...plus what was he talking about telling him earlier.

"Told you about what earlier?"

"You didn't hear us talking?"

"I can't always hear whats going on back here."

"Selena's pregnant."

"What?! That means..."

"No...no. Its mine."

"Excuse me...what? I may not be an expert but I know enough about the human anatomy to know that the last time I checked humans weren't...ahem...compatible that way with Turians."

"We aren't. We dont know how it happened."

"A miracle?"

Garrus chuckled. "Yeah, maybe."

"Thanks for the talk...Steven."

"Anytime."

Garrus got up and started to the elevator to go to the Battery. He missed that place already. He did want to believe Selena...but after everything she did, he didn't know how.


	33. The Faults In You

Chapter 33●The Faults In You

Selena punched the button to open her cabin door. She was sure she broke it. She unfastened her armor as she went in, leaving a trail of N7 armor from the door to the steps. "How can he have the audacity to tell me that I didn't tell him soon enough? I didn't know!"

She plopped down on her bed and groaned into her pillow. Just as she went to roll over EDI chimed over the intercom.

"Admiral Hackett would like to speak to you Commander."

She sighed. "Patch it through to my Cabin. Thanks."

She hurriedly put on a shirt and shorts and set down in her desk chair in front of the vid screen.

"Commander,How are you?"

"Ok Admiral. How about yourself?"

"Im fine but I didn't call to talk about myself. I heard about your...secret."

Selena chuckled, knowing what he was talking about. He was talking about her pregnancy.

"News got out that fast huh?"

"News about you go's around quick."

"I guess so."

"What I wanted to talk about though. You can't be in this fight pregnant. We can't have you getting yourself hurt in this condition, you'd be putting two lives on the line and I can't have you doing that. Im sorry Commander."

Selena frowned. She knew the truth and had thought about that numerous times. She knew she couldn't fight and it angered her but she knew that she couldn't and wouldn't kill her baby.

"I understand Admiral. Please keep me updated. Shepard out."

The comm channel went out. Selena slumped back in her chair. She couldn't help thinking about what happened between her and Garrus. The thought made her blood boil. "He knows better."

What was she saying. She should know better...it was her fault.

"You're an idiot!" She screamed. "You're a worthless piece of trash!" She told herself.

"The only person I have to be mad at...is myself."


	34. It Takes Courage

Chapter 34●It Takes Courage

A/N-Due to Selena's hormones,chapters may be back and forth in emotion so...hope you enjoy roller coasters!-

Two days after their trip to Palaven Selena went to see Garrus.

"Hey Garrus."

Garrus turned around to look at her.

"Hey." He said quietly.

"Im sorry." They said in unison.

"Sorry." Garrus apologized.

Selena chuckled. "Its fine. Do you have a minute to talk?"

"Definently."

"I just got a message from Chakwas. She wants to do my next checkup early. Will you come with me?" Selena was prepared for the worst to come. She was afraid she had gone to far.

"Sure."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I think its only fair that I go."

"You're sure you want to go?"

Garrus sighed.

"Are you trying to talk me out of it?"

"No..no."

"Okay. So when do you go?"

"0600...today."

"Today?"

"Yes...today. Does that not work for you?" She said annoyed.

"Itll be fine." Garrus said quickly. He didn't want to get into another fight...again.

"Fine." Selena walked out the door and headed for the fridge. She was suddenly starving.

"Hmm. No...no...no. Aha! Jackpot. Hamburgers!"

She took 2 on a plate and headed for her cabin. Why was she so hungry? Oh...pregancy...right.

She was also moody...very moody...she was happy one time, then sad, the angry...frickin hormones.

"Dr Chakwas would like to speak with you Commander." EDI chimed in.

"Thanks EDI." Selena sat her plate down and wiped her mouth. So...maybe not the most healthy thing to eat for your kid but if that's what you want then that must be what the baby wants.

"Selena, how are you?"

"Good. Im actually feeling really good right now. Give me a few minutes to go totally bitchy though."

Karin chuckled. "Its pregnancy hormones dear. They like to do that."

"Yeah...thats always fun. So tonight at 0600 right?"

"Right. I expect to see you on time?"

"Will do! Oh by the way. Garrus is coming with me."

"You're kidding?"

"Nope. It suprised me to. And another thing. Im getting fat!"

"Selena...thats going to happen."

"For how long?"

"Well...we will figure that out tonight."

"Okay. See you tonight. Selena out."

Selena walked over to her bed and plopped down to take a nap. Just as she started to drift off...there was a knock at her door.

"What?!"

"Lena...its Garrus." Selena froze. This was the first time he came up to her cabin since the...ordeal and the first time hes called her Lena in...weeks! "Hang on."

"What to do, what to do?" Selena whispered to herself. She knew she was going to let him in but...what were they going to talk about?...hmm...maybe the most obvious thing...the pregnancy.

"This will be interesting."

With that she walked to the door and hit the unlock. "Doors unlocked."

The door opened to that gorgeous Turian that she still couldn't understand why she cheated on him. 'Is it getting hot in here? Ah hormones.' She thought.

"Hey, Lena." Selena stepped to the side.

"Come on in."

"Thanks."

'So...what now?' She thought as he sat down and patted the spot beside him.

"Come sit with me."

Selena was shocked. 'So we go from angry to nothing happened. Interesting.' She thought as she walked over and sat down not sure if she was fully prepared for what he was going to say.

"Ok..Here it goes. My Father and Sister will be here in 3 days. They're coming to the Citadel."

Selena's mouth hung open. Did he just say what she thought he said? Oh boy.

"Oh."

"Are you angry?" He asked.

"No. Its just unexpected."

Selena was nervous. What we're the customs for Turians meeting their childrens mates for the first time? Were they the same as human customs? She had a lot of research to do in 3 days.


	35. Extranet Research

Chapter 35●Extranet Research

Selena sat down at her desk to do some research. "What am I supposed to do? I don't know anything about this!"

She brought up an article.

'Do you have relationship troubles? Are you dating an alien? If so, this is the place for you!'

Selena groaned. "This is ridiculous."

She clicked on another article.

'Have you been molested by an alien?'

"What the hell? Different article!"

She clicked on another one again.

'Do you not know about alien customs?'

"No, no I don't."

'Are you fretting about not knowing?'

"Yes!" She exclaimed. "How did you know?"

She preceeded to read. "Yes."

"Why?" She was asking questions that no one was going to answer.

"Okay. I think I'm good now...I think."

She got up and laid out on the bed. She laid her hands over her quickly growing stomach. "You're making me fat." She told the baby. Just when she was about to curl up for her nap again before her appointment there was a knock on her door again.

"What?!" She groaned.

"Lena its Garrus. Are you ready?"

"Wait...how long was I on the extranet?"

"What?"

"Nothing! Yeah, I'll be right there."

She grabbed a t-shirt out of her drawer and put it on. It was getting harder to get it over her stomach. She needed to get new clothes.

"Im coming!"

She walked out the door straight into Garrus.

"Oh, sorry. I didnt realize you were right at the door."

"Ive been standing here for 15 minutes. You okay?"

"Yeah. Lets go." They headed on their way to the CIC to board the Citadel. Selena was ready to get it over with...she had a feeling it was going to easily get akward with Garrus being there.

She loved him but she didn't honestly know if he loved her at all anymore or not. There wasn't a spark there anymore. She made a huge mistake. A huge mistake.

They boarded the Citadel and started towards the elevator. Selena saw a very familiar face out of the corner of her eye. 'Cass? What the?' She thought. Garrus apparently saw him to. He started growling and pushed Selena behind himself. He was being defensive.

"Garrus what the hell?"

"He's here." He ground out.

"Garrus I have nothing to do with him anymore I...Garrus!" She screamed as he took of towards Cass. "Garrus!" She ran after him. She came to a stop in front of one of the shops. She saw Garrus and Cass sparring for dominance.

"Really?!"

They both whipped their heads around to see her. Neither of them spoke before going back at it. "Stop!"

"No!" Selena screamed as Cass swung and hit Garrus in the scarred side of his face.

"Stop it!" Neither of them paid attention to her.

Selena needed to do something but she didnt know what. She was scared for Garrus. Once again he was distracted and fighting. "What am I going to do?"

Selena turned around to hear a loud bang.

"Oh my God!" Selena ran over to Garrus laying on the ground barely breathing.

Cass dropped his pistol and stared. He apparently didnt realize what he had done.

"Oh my God...Garrus you'll be okay. Im going to get you help."

A few hours later Selena was sitting in Huerta with Garrus. He had been put under to perform surgery from the damage. They said that they weren't sure he would wake up. She heard a knock on the door and got up to answer it.

"Cass." She growled.

She grabbed his arm and pulled him out of Huerta. "What the hell! You shot him! You are a merciless asshole!"

"I kno-"

"No! You have ruined things for the last time! You could have killed him. If anything happens to him I will kill you."

"I didnt-"

"I dont want to hear it." She pulled her hidden pistol.

"Do you see this?" He didnt answer.

"Do you see this?!" She screamed.

"Yes!" He held his hands up.

"This will be the gun I'll use. Memorize it, fear it. Because if he...dies...I'll hunt you down like the animal you are."

Cass didnt say anything more before Selena walked back into Huerta.


	36. The Matter Of Life And Death

Chapter 36●The Matter Of Life And Death

A/N-So this'll be an interesting chapter! Hope you like it and please R&R! ?-

Selena was reading when Garrus woke up.

"Garrus?" Selena pulled the chair she was sitting in closer. "Hey." She said.

He looked over at her. "Is he still alive?"

She didn't expect that question from him but she wished he wasn't alive either.

"Yes, but believe me...I wish he wasn't." She said, her voice stone cold.

"What made you change your mind about that?"

She hung her head. She had blocked him out of her life. She buried her feelings for him so far they were gone. She deleted every single message he had ever sent her, but now...she wanted him dead.

"When he shot you. I was terrified you were dead."

"Well I'm not. Im still alive."

"And you better stay that way."

"Ill-"

His face went blank. He was staring at her but was silent. He wasnt moving. She looked up at his monitor, he was still alive but something was very wrong.

"Nurse!" Selena yelled. She looked down at Garrus. He was still just...there.

Ths nurse came running in and her first look at him she called for the doctor.

"What's wrong with him?" Selena asked.

The nurse looked up at her. "Ma'm we wont know completely til the doctor gets here but my best guess is internal bleeding. He is still alive but with all the medication he has been using right now,he could very well go comatose."

"So, what now?"

"If it is internal bleeding,surgery."

Selena sat down in the chair. 'If I hadn't started this with Cass none of this would have happened.' She thought. Just as she looked up the doctor ran into the room. He was a small salarian doctor.

He checked him over and issued surgery.

"Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"Please, take good care of him."

"Always take good care of patients. Never had one problem. He will be fine." He assured her.

The longer she sat there the more her blood boiled. 'If it hadn't been for Cass coming into my life I would never have thought about this. This is his fault!' She said to herself.

She started scratching at her jeans. She got up and started pacing to occupy herself, it wasn't working. She got even angrier and threw a punch at the wall. She didn't care that she put a hole through it. She walked out of the room to leave the hospital. She had told him that if something happened to him she would kill him. That day had come.


	37. The End Of Casius

Chapter 37●The End of Casius

A/N-Just as a warning my Shepard is a renegade so this chapter is going to be more brutal due to that. Very short chapter. R&R!-

Selena stomped through the Citadel to find Cass. "That bastard will pay for what he did. This is the end." She muttered to herself.

She saw many Turians but none of them were Cass. She continued to look for him. She stopped at a bench and turned around to see a familiar face.

"Casius."

She started to walk towards him. She pulled her pistol,ready to kill him right in the middle of the Citadel. He turned around to meet her eyes and froze. She said that she would be back for him, she was coming. He took off running. Selena took off after him.

"Casius!" She screamed. She didnt really care what people thought. She was filled with rage. If anyone looked at her or touched her she would shoot them.

She took a shot at him, hitting him in the leg. He dropped down to the ground.

"You're screwed now Casius."

Cass was obviously scared but she didnt care.

She put the gun to his head. "No...that'd be to quick."

She set the pistol against his stomach and pulled the trigger. The bang was loud enough her ears rang.

Cass' breathing became labored. "You...you shot me."

"I told you I'd be back for you. I always keep my promises."

Everyone who was standing around them ran.

"Goodbye Casius...for the very last time."

Selena got up and walked away just as Cass took his last breath. She didnt care who found him. She just cared that it was over. She worried once the adrenaline left her system she would regret what she did. She would be the one to have to live with the consequences. The only thing she worried about, was Garrus.


	38. The Hospital

Chapter 38●The Hospital

"How is he?" Selena asked the doctor.

"He's fine as of now. Wont know for sure til wakes up. Have to have patience."

Selena huffed. "Okay. Thanks. When can I go see him?"

"You're welcome to go in room at any time. Should be waking up before long."

Selena nodded. "Thanks."

She walked towards his room and looked through the window. He was laying in the bed asleep, he looked so peaceful.

She walked up to the door and waited for it to open. The quiet whoosh of the door startled her, she had gone into her own world.

She walked in and sat down next to Garrus. "Garrus I made such a mistake." She started. "I started this mess and wish I hadn't. I lost you and still dont think it was worth it to lose you. I did sleep with Cass but it was an accident. I wish it had never happened because to get myself into another problem and possibly lose you again would kill me. I wish I wasnt to much of a coward to say all this when you were awake. Yeah, that's right. I stopped Saren, saved the Citadel, fought the collectors and am now fighting reapers but I cant say something to your face when you're awake. You better pull through, without you I'm not me, without you I can't do this and without you...remember...there's no Shepard without Vakarian." She had tears streaming down her face now.

"I did hear all that you said."

Selena looked at Garrus. He was awake.

"Garrus! You're awake!"

"Yeah. Tired but awake. You need to get ahold of my father and sister and tell them to wait a few more days to come." He muttered. He looked so tired.

"Okay. I can do that." She wrapped her 5 digit hand around his 3 digit hand and squeezed his hand. "You'll be okay. I believe in you." He gave her the faintest of smiles before falling back asleep. She hoped the conversation would go well between her and his father and sister. She was sure that she'd get blamed for everything. "Here goes nothing." She thought. She found his dad's address and typed it in. She walked out of the room hoping itd go better than she hoped.


	39. Family Troubles

Chapter 39●Family Troubles

Selena sat down in a bench outside the hospital and dialed the ping address. A few moments later a darker plated Turian with the same blue markings and eyes as Garrus answered.

"Who are you?" The man asked bitterly.

"Im Selena. Garrus' mate."

"Im sorry for jumping down your throat Selena. My name is Terin, Terin Vakarian."

"Its very nice to meet...you both? I assume that's Garrus' sister?"

Terin looked behind him to see Solana.

"Yes. Thats Solana."

"Hi!" Solana' voice was quieter than Garrus' and squeakier.

"Hi Solana. Um I actually called to tell you that you need to wait a few more days to come. There's been an accident."

She was weary to say that last sentence, knowing that as soon as she said what happened they would most likely blame her. She wad to blame.

"What's happened?"

"Garrus...was shot. He is stable as of now. He just got out of surgery. He wanted to see you when he felt better."

"Will he be okay?"

Selena shrugged. "The doctor told me that they would be back in soon. He hadn't been back in when I left. But from my best guess, yes. He seems fine to me. Just tired."

"Okay. We still are coming. If something happens to my son and I dont get to see him before he...I will ne very angry. I have to see him, just to be sure."

"Alright. Ill make sure to tell Garrus when he wakes up. We're in room 132 in Huerta."

Terin just nodded before saying thank you and shutting off the vid screen. Now she had to tell Garrus that they were still coming. She hoped he was going to be fine.

She walked into his room. He was awake now. "Garrus?"

He looked over at her. The whole right side of his face bandaged from the shot. He looked...awful.

"Your Father and Sister are still coming. Terin wouldn't take no for an answer. He told me that just in case something were to happen to you...worse than just being shot...that he wanted to see you. I told him that you were going to be ok."

"Thats my father for you. He wont take no for an answer with anything. Thats just him. Hes very strict on it being his way or no way though he's a good man."

"I could tell that by talking to him. I got to see your sister too. Shes gorgeous."

"Thanks. She is my best friend. I havent seen her in years. Dad sent me photos of her while she had her cast. She had grown up so much."

"It doesn't take long for time to pass."

"No it doesnt. Especially when you're fighting a reaper war."

"Very much so then." Garrus agreed.

"Has the doctor been back in?"

"Yeah. He said that I'd be fine. Hes a great doctor."

"Yes he is. Some part of him reminds me of Mordin. The horrible part of me likes to toy with that Salarian that keeps telling me to stop touching his equipment. Its funny to listen to him say "don't touch that!" Louder and louder each time."

"You ar evil." They both laughed. Garrus groaned.

"Don't make me laugh. It hurts...horribly."

"Sorry."

"I'm going to let you get some sleep. Im going to go mess with that Salarian again. It entertains me."

Selena got up and hit the door panel.

"Lena?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't leave Huerta...I need you."

That was the last thing she expected out of his mouth.


	40. Make Up Your Mind

Chapter 40●Why Now?

A/N-Very short chapter update. Hope you enjoy. Please R&R!-

Selena thought it over many times in her head. Why would Garrus suddenly decide that he needed her? Yesterday he could have cared less.

"It could be from his head injury for all I know." She thought out loud. She chuckled at that one. She knew that wasn't the case. He either actually wanted her back or there was a specific reason at the moment.

She wasn't looking forward to Terin and Solana coming. She knew once she explained everything they would blame her. She was to blame though. None of this would have happened if it weren't for her idiotic decision. She never would have had to kill Cass. Some part of her wished she hadn't done it, but another part says that he was horrible. He tried to kill Garrus over love she made him believe could be.

Her next question for herself was when she was going to tell Garrus that Cass was dead. He had to be told sometime and she didn't want it to be through the news. It was going to be all over the headlines soon so she had to tell him as soon as possible. She just wasn't sure how. She knew he wanted him dead, but what would he think when she told him she killed him? Would it resolve matters any? Or would it make them worse? 'The only way to know is to find out.' She was just about to get up to go to his room when two Turians walked through the door.

"Terin?" She said suprised.


	41. Guilt

Chapter 41●Guilt

A/N-Now she meets Garrus' family. Please R&R! It helps me continue!-

"Terin?"

"Selena I presume?"

"Yes. And this is Solana?"

"Hi!" Solana said. She was a smaller Turian with the same plate color and markings as Garrus. The blue eyes were a family trait. They all had them.

"Hi. Its nice to meet you finally. Garrus has been talking about you both a lot lately. He was so worried about Solana when she broke her leg. He wanted to talk to you earlier but he was asleep." She told Terin.

"I understand. He needs sleep right now." Compared to Garrus, Terin was a skyscraper. He had to be 6'5 at least. It made him look very intimidating. Now she was even more nervous to tell them how it happened.

"Please come sit. I have something to tell you."

Terin nodded and motioned for Solana to follow him. She was like his shadow. "What happened to Garrus, was my fault."

Terin looked angry. "You shot my son?" He said irrate.

"No! No! But another Turian that I had been...affiliated with while I was with Garrus shot him."

"So what you just told me was a nice way of saying you cheated on him?"

"Yes. I wish I could take it back. I didnt want it this way...ever. I was the cause of all of this and I...everyone keeps trying to tell me that I'm just human, we make mistakes. Yes thats true but this was one big screw up! I want a do over button but there isnt one and I have to live with the consequences. The other Turian, his name was Cass...a spectre. Maybe you'd heard of him?"

"The name doesn't sound familliar. You said was, is he dead?" He was still irrate but he atleast didn't look like he wanted to kill her.

"Yes...by my hands."

Terin and Solana both looked at her suprised by her words. "You killed him?"

"Yes. He shot Garrus in a fit of rage. He could have killed him! I threatened him that I'd be back for him if something else happened to Garrus. Garrus had to have a second surgery. I went back for him and I killed him in a fit of rage. Just like he shot Garrus."

Terin had lost his anger for now and came to sit by her. "I know it seems like killing the one who hurt your mate, family or friends is better than leaving them alive but thats not the case. I learned from experience. A long time ago I killed a very close friend for...whats the human term...flirting with my wife. I regretted it afterwards."

Selena got up and paced. "This is different. He wasn't trying to steal my mate." She said annoyed by Terin not seeing her reason. "He tried to kill him. He shot him, in the head. He barely was alive when I got to him. I thought there was no hope. But he proved me wrong again. He came back. And now theres another thing."

Terin nodded for her to go on. "I'm pregnant...by Garrus. I'm due in April." Now she just waited for his answer.

"Spirits."


	42. Explanation

Chapter 42●Explanation

"When did you find this out?"

"Almost 3 weeks ago. I was already two weeks pregnant at the time."

"So...you said you're due in april? Thats a long time for pregnancy isnt it?"

"Not for humans. Its natural for it to be that long, the only time its unnatural is when its to short of a gestation period."

"Oh. Turians are much shorter...for pregnancy that is." Terin said jokingly.

Selena chuckled. "Yeah. You're much taller than we are. Well some humans can be 7' so I shouldn't say that but you're taller than me atleast."

"Im not!" Solana said as she came to stand by her. She had just turned 18. I Turian years that would be like a 25 to 30 year old human. They hit adulthood earlier. She hit Selena right below her ear. Selena stood 5'7 so Solana was short for a Turian.

"No you're not. I like that though. Id rather look right at or down at a person than to have to look straight up at someone. It gets uncomfortable."

"I understand. I have to look up constantly. So, whats it like being part of the Alliance and being in the war?"

"Now Solana,thats no question to just ask someone." Terin said.

"Sorry." Solana apologized.

"Its okay sweetie. Its not all its cracked up to be. Its exhilarating,exciting, terrifying. It scares you. It excites you. You dont always want to get up and go on with your day because you know what you'll face. And just because what you faced yesterday wasn't bad, that doesnt mean what you find the next day is going to be the same."

"Its sounds...awesome!" Solana yelled.

"I always thought it did too. It is awesome at times but then there are the times you dont want to do it. Your afraid. It takes guts."

"Im not afraid." Solana stood proud.

"Ill tell you what." Selena walked over to Terin. "The way it sounds Garrus will be able to come back to the Normandy Friday. We have doctor on board that can treat his wounds. How would you two like to come with us? We cant and wont go through battle. I wont put you two at risk and I'm not allowed to due to my pregnancy. We have an extra room."

"We have two days to decide. Ill think about it." Solana clapped her hands.

"Yay!" She acted more like a 12 year old but Selena didnt mind. She may not be the nicest of people but she had a sweet spot for kids.

"Who wants to go visit Garrus first?"


	43. Visitors

Chapter 43●Visitors

"Me! Me!" Solana held her hand up. She obviously missed her brother.

"Okay come on then." Selena hit the door panel. The door opened with a quiet whoosh alerting Garrus of someone entering.

"Garrus!" Solana yelled. She ran over and hugged him.

"Careful...careful..." Garrus groaned.

"Sorry." Solana pulled back and smiled. "I missed you."

"I missed you too Sol." Garrus smiled back at her the best he could. "I see your leg healed perfect." Garrus said.

"Yeah,it didnt take long." Solana moved back and pulled a chair over. "Do you still remember when we used to go out to our old firing range? And you showed me how to I quote "properly" shoot a sniper rifle." Solana asked.

"Of course I remember. Those were some of the best times. Or how about when you started learning how to drive. Dad put me in charge of teaching you. The first time you accelerated it you crashed it into the pole in front of you." Garrus chuckled. "I kept telling you to turn it but you didn't. You just kept going backwards, then forwards...back into the pole. You finally got the hang of it though. I really don't know how that skycar survived." Garrus actually laughed. He seemed to regret it afterwards, he groaned and held the bandaged side of his face.

"Hey...at least I don't drive like that anymore. But now that I know how to drive...that time is a lot funnier." Solana laughed. She had heard Garrus laugh before but never Solana. Her laugh almost sounded like bells ringing...it was strange and beautiful at the same time.

Selena hated to break this up but Garrus' father was waiting outside. She was sure he was getting impatient. "Solana? I hate to break this up but your father is waiting. Im sure he'd like to see you."

Solana looked at Garrus and smiled. "I love you Garrus." She said before she hugged him, gentler this time.

"I love you too Sol." He hugged her back the best he could.

"Ill go now. Ill tell Dad he can come in."

Selena nodded and smiled. "How are you doing?" Selena asked Garrus.

"Okay. It was hard seeing Sol. Only because I know I may not get to see her again."

"That's not true." Selena said with a smile on her face.

"What are y-Hey Dad." Garrus cut off his sentence just as Terin walked in.

"Hi Son. How are you?" Terin asked.

"Alright. And you?"

"Better now that I know you can speak and...move."

"Im fine Dad. A little sore but fine. I can go back to the Normandy Friday. Im ready to go back to a more comfortable environment."

"I know. Its not fun at all to be in a hospital. Let alone be the one in the bed."

Terin started to speak but looked at Selena. "I dont mean to be rude but would you mind leaving us alone for a few minutes?"

"Of course not."

Selena stepped outside the door and set down across from Solana. "Did you have fun talking to Garrus again? It seemed like you really missed each other."

"Yes I did. We all missed Garrus."

Selena was to curious not to ask. "I have a question. Tell me if going to far. Do you and Garrus have a Mother still? Its just that he never speaks of her."

"Oh. No. She passed away right before Garrus left Palaven for the Citadel. She had,well I'll put it this way, its less confusing. She had the Turian version of Leukemia. It spread fast. She was only 35, it shouldn't have been so soon. She should have lived out her whole life."

"Im sorry I brought it up Solana."

"No its okay. Its just a weak spot for all of us. Even though its been so long."

Terin walked out of the room and Selena got up. "I told him about your offer. He seemed...surprised."

"Ill talk to him later. Right now he probably needs some rest."

"I agree. We will be staying in room 24 on the Citadel if you need us. You're welcome anytime Selena."

"Thank you Terin."

Terin nodded to her as they left. Selena walked back into Garrus' room. "What were you thinking?" She heard. All she could think right now was 'uh-oh.


	44. About That

Chapter 44●About That

"What do you mean? Its a chance for you to spend time with your Sister and Father. Im sure it won't be as bad as you think. Besides, you haven't seen them in years. You need more than a quick hi and bye."

"You never had to live with my Father. Im not worried about my Sister. You dont know the trouble we used to get into." He smiled. "I'm worried about my Father." His smile faded. "He used to push me to do things I never wanted to do. He used to make me do what he wanted to do, like take C-Sec for instance. I didn't want that job, I wanted to be a Spectre, and I was a candidate. But my Father told me it would put shame to my species because I would become like Saren. Everyone accused me of being like Saren. I always told them that I was a Turian yes but I wasn't like Saren. I killed Saren, and they still told me I could turn into him. It was obvious I didn't want anything to do with his side. Some of the other Turians that I knew fell into his 'trance' that he did nothing wrong, they got themselves killed."

"I never knew all that. Why did you never tell me?"

"Because I knew you would A. Either over react or B. Try to kill my Father...just like you killed...C...c..c.." He couldn't even say his name. She didn't blame him. Saying his name now left a bad taste in her mouth.

"You know? How?"

"My Father told me. Not to mention its all over the news. They just don't know who the killer is."

"And its better that way."

"Selena, you can't just go kill people."

Selena turned around to look him in the eye. "What the hell are you saying?! I am Commander Selena frickin Shepard. I will do what I want, say what I want and kill who I want. And don't me you didnt try to kill him. It wad obvious Garrus. You wanted him dead. Besides, you have no room to talk, you were Archangel. You killed hundreds!"

"That's different! I killed Mercs, I killed bad people."

"So we're just going to pretend that he didnt shoot you? That he didnt try to kill you? That he was just pointing his gun at you for fun and it just, oops, went off?"

"Where did this sudden change of heart for him come from?"

"WHEN HE TRIED TO KILL YOU!" She screamed. "You dont understand. He tried to kill you! A bullet through the head, if I hadn't of been there to save you, you would have been dead...and it would have been my fault. Its my fault you even got shot."

"Why is it your fault?" He asked her. It almost was like he was saying she tried to kill him. It was in the way he said it.

"What happened to you? You're so frickin delirious! You say I had a change of heart but you really did. What now that he's dead you want the friction back or something?"

"No! Thats not it at all."

"Then what is it Garrus?"

"You killed a Spectre...I didnt realize he was one til I saw the insignia."

"So what? Is it some kind of ridiculous thing from the past? You wanted to be one and I killed one?"

"No."

"Why was it any different when we killed Saren?"

"Because he had a reason to be killed!"

"And Casius didn't?! He deserved to frickin die Garrus. I don't know how many times I've said it. He tried to kill you...what more do you want me to say?"

"He didn't try to kill me. You did."

"What?!"

A/N-Cliffhanger! Hope you enjoy it and please R&R!-


	45. Questions

Chapter 45●Questions

"What?!"

"It was your fault."

"What is going on with you? Yesterday you told me that it wasn't my fault."

"I've had more of a chance to think about it."

"I know that its my fault we're in this mess but I didn't try to kill you."

"I saw you draw your gun. I saw you fire it."

"What are you talking about? If it hadn't been for me being there, you'd be dead."

"If it wasn't for you I wouldn't be here!."

Selena sat back in her chair and looked into his eyes. She no longer saw the Garrus she knew. It was somebody completely different.

"Garrus?"

"What?"

"I didn't do it." She sobbed.

He didnt answer her. He looked towards the window but never offered to look at her. As she finally let the realization hit her she broke down. She hiccuped between every sob. She was on the floor pulling her legs up towards her chest. She didn't know what had happened to him but he wasn't himself. Maybe it was the medication.

She looked up to see him staring at her with a cold glare. For the first time he was scaring her. She didn't know what to do. Everything she said just made matters worse.

Seeing him like this made her cry more. She choked out a sob and buried her head between her knees. She didn't want to look up into his eyes. She knew he wasn't himself.

"Lena?" She heard.

She finally looked up to gentle blue eyes. He looked genuinely concerned.

"Garrus?" She didn't know where this change had come from, she didn't know how long it'd last.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"No, not really." She pushed her sobs back.

"Come here." He said. It comforted her.

She crawled up off the floor and curled up against him in the bed. He rubbed her back soothingly. She was just finally lulling off to sleep when his talons tightened into fists and he pushed her off the bed. She landed with an 'oof'.

"What the-Garrus?"

"Don't come near me." He said. His voice hard as steel.

She didn't know what had happened to him but whatever it was...the Garrus she knew was gone.


	46. Two-Faced

Chapter 46●Two-Faced

A/N-Sorry for the long wait everybody! I got behind and then didn't have time. Ill hopefully be back to updating just as much as usual now. Hope you like this chapter and please R&R!-

"Garrus, what is wrong with you?"

He gave her a cold glare. She knew he wasn't himself. She needed an answer to what was going on.

"Garrus?! Answer me."

He still just stared at her. He had her on her last nerve, and she was afraid that nerve was going to break any second now. She needed a doctors opinion. She waved him off and headed for the door.

She walked up to the Asari at the nurses desk. "Where is Doctor Theron?"

"Right down this hall to your left." She pointed. "He's in his office."

"Thank you."

Selena went to his door and knocked furiously. "Doctor Theron?!" He quickly opened his door and about got knocked over by Selena rushing in.

"Theres somethimg wrong with Garrus."

"I assure you. Garrus is fine. Seemed fine last time I saw him anyway."

"This morning he started acting funny. Just completely not acting like himself. Then 3 minutes later he'd be fine, and as soon as he came back he left, he wouldn't be himself again. He asked me to lay beside him and then 2 seconds later pushed me out and told me not to come near him. What is wrong with him?"

"Will have to see for myself."

Selena groaned and nodded. "Fine."

They both went into his room and Garrus still had an icy cold glare. She knew he was still not himself.

"Garrus. How are you?" Theron asked.

"Leave. Me. Alone."

Theron stepped back and looked at him. "Something wrong?"

Garrus sat up and grabbed Theron around his throat. "I. Said. LEAVE ME ALONE!" Garrus screamed. Selena jumped backwards and screamed. "Let him go!" Garrus still had ahold of Theron's neck but he turned and glared at her.

"You dont give me orders."

Selena got angrier with him by the second. "Let Theron go!" He finally released his hold on his neck. Theron gasped for air and coughed holding his throat. Selena rushed over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?" Theron nodded and looked up at her. "Garrus has a mental problem."

"No shit! I could have told you that."

Theron finally made it up off the floor. "Talk about it in my office." He motioned for her to follow. Selena nodded and watched Garrus as they walked out of the room. He just glared at her. No longer himself at all.

They got to his office and she set down in the closest chair she found. "What can we do?" She asked.

"That's the hard part. Have to run tests, he wont let anyone near him."

"What about me? If there is possibly any of the old Garrus left maybe I can persuade him to come with."

"To dangerous."

"Im an Alliance Marine,Spectre and savior of the galaxy...I think I can handle it."

"Alright. Suppose it could work. Be careful."

"I will. Do you keep a pair of cuffs somewhere?"

He blinked a few times. "Im a doctor. What do you think?"

"Alright, alright. Do you know of anyone who might have a pair?"

"We're in hospital. So no."

She got his point but needed something to keep him restrained. "Do you have anything that I can use to restrain him? If you want to run test I have to have something."

"Let me check." He rifled around in his desk til he pulled out a small box. He opened it and inside was a pair of cuffs. "Well...I didnt know I had these."

"Problem solved! Thanks!" She grabbed the cuffs and ran out. She hoped that this would go better than she figured it would.  
●○●○●○●○●○●○●○● 


	47. Test Subject

Chapter 47●Test Subject

A/N-Quick update chapter! Im not sure when I'll be able to update next. Its been busy as of late. Hope you like the chapter and please R&R!-

Selena walked into Garrus' room. He was asleep and she hoped he'd stay that way til she cuffed him. It would make her job easier. She watched him out of the corner of her eye each time she moved. Her luck ran out when he woke up...but something was different.

"Lena?"

"Hey Garrus. How are you?"

"Okay other than a headache."

"Im sorry sweetie. The doctor has to perform a few tests before you can go home. We have to go down the hall. Can you come with me?"

"Su-what?" His voice had taken on a darker tone.

"Oh no. Garrus dont start this."

"Dont start what?" Now he was back to himself. What was going on?

"Umm nothing. Lets go." She pulled out the cuffs and put them on.

"What are you doing?!"

"Its for your own safety. Come on." She couldn't tell him the actual problem. She was afraid she'd scare him and make it harder. After it was all over she could say something.

They were on their way to the room. People were looking at them odd but she didnt blame them. She was basically dragging along a Turian in a hospital gown, plus why would you need handcuffs to just move someone? She was just glad that the gown wasn't open in the back.

"Doctor Theron? Hes here."

"Id really like to know why the handcuffs are necessary."

She sighed. "I cant tell you...yet."

"Yet?" He scoffed.

"Theres a reason."

He groaned and shifted his weight to one foot. He was annoyed she knew but she rathered him be cuffed and easier to restrain if he went...wacky.

"Ready for test."

"Doctor Theron, whats going on?" Garrus looked terrified and it made her want to cry but this wad necessary.

"Relax Garrus. All will be over soon."

That didnt relax him at all. It honestly seemed to scare him more. She took him over to the table and set him down. He looked at her scared and she couldnt help but pull his head to her chest to try and soothe him. It seemed to work somewhat.

"Lay down." She said softly.

She hated to do it but she clamped the arm restraints down. That scared him but she reassured him that he'd be okay.

"Ready?"

Selena nodded. She didnt want to cause him any pain or fear but this had to be done. She hoped that this could be fixed. That maybe it was some kind of freak accident that happened during his last surgery. All she wished was for him to be normal again.


	48. Hospital Stories

Heart Of Courage Chapter 48~Hospital Stories

A/N-Hey so I got to update quicker than I expected! Please R&R and I hope you like it!-

"Garrus,Youll be fine."

"Lena I dont think I can do this."

All she did was shoosh him before the Doctor went to work poking and prodding him for blood samples. Garrus grunted and groaned at each push of the needle. He had much tougher skin than humans but that didnt make bruising much harder when youre constantly poked with a needle for 3 days.

Garrus tried to watch Selena the whole time the Doctor worked with him. She wanted to cry when she saw his eyes. He looked completely terrified and she would be lying if she told him she didnt feel the same way. She wanted to tell him why she had to handcuff him and why the doctor shyed away when he raised his hand...and why when he raised his voice it scared her, She knew he thought something was going on,and it was...he just couldnt know.

She took her eyes off Garrus for a second to control her racing wanted to just grab Garrus and run out with him but she knew these tests had to be performed for his own good...and hers. She feared what his future would be if the tests werent done or if the Doctor couldnt resolve the problem. He was sort of Bi Polar right now. He had never been that way before or after she knew him. She didnt know what started it and she honestly wondered if it wasnt some freak accident from the pills he was taking. It was obvious that wasnt the case...he stopped taking those 3 days ago. She wondered if he had been secretly injected with sonething but that was crazy...no one other than doctors and nurses had done anything with him or to him except his family and herself. She knew they wouldnt do anything to harm him nor would she.

The Doctor continued to poke and prod. She kept wondering how much blood he needed. He was going to be out of blood by the time he was through. Then she noticed he was injecting something.

"What in the hell are you injecting?"

"Calming injection. Very important for his condition."

Selena watched him inject the rest of the "fluid". It was a nasty green liquid that seemed to burn when injected. Garrus grunted in pain each time he injected it. She felt so bad for him and wished she could do more for him but she was at a loss for what to do. There wasn't anything she could do.

"When will you be done with this? Its very uncomfortable for him."

"Patience. Will be done soon."

"How many shots does he need? This is ridiculous. You've already done 6 shots."

"Very tall. Takes more for larger patients."

Selena rolled her eyes and squeezed his hand in a a silent apology. She knew he didnt want to be here but there was no other option. It had to be done. 'Please God,let this be over soon.' She silently prayed. She wasnt a nice person in the least but she was religious. Everyone laughed at her when she ever said anything because she was a very tough skinned woman. She didnt take crap from anyone nor did she let anyone complain about her and get away with it. That was the exact reason she was so quiet. She knew that if she said anything more people would be getting hurt in this galaxy then being saved...this time by her hands.

"Done." Was simply what Dr Theron said.

"Finally. So what now?"

"Run blood tests. He will start to feel light headed soon and sleep. He will be asleep for most likely a day. He needs to be asleep during testing."

They both nodded and watched the Doctor leave the room. As soon as he left Selena got down on her knees and started talking to Garrus.

"The reason for these tests...You were becoming violent. It was getting worse,fast. We werent sure what caused it but it wasnt good. This was our only option and that was the reason for the calming drug and the handcuffs. We had no idea when you would lose your temper and possibly hurt or...kill someone. We were afraid of the consequences and we knew you were unaware. I tried to reason with you many times but none of the times did it work. You just became angrier. I know I put you through alot and you were upset but you had forgiven me...I hope you still have. I dont want to lose you again. I made stupid mistakes many times in my life but these two were the worst. You know now that I am the one who killed Casius and I dont regret it in the least. I hope you can see to reason why I killed him. He tried to kill you and deserved it. I wanted nothing to do with him and wanted him dead after this happened. The pregnancy is progresing and I am not allowed to fight so after we are finally done here we will just be living on the Normandy. Your family is possibly going to come stay with us during the whole duration of the pregnancy. I plan to give birth on the Normandy. Now that my rant is over...I love you Garrus Vakarian. Never forget that. I want you and only you."

"Lena I..." He was getting tired and it was becoming harder for him to form words.

"Sleep Garrus. Ill be here when you wake up."

With that last sentence he dosed off. She watched him for a moment to be sure he was definently asleep and walked out of the room for a moment to get a coffee. She was getting tired and she didnt want to fall asleep. She hated the dreams she had. She wouldnt have Garrus to comfort her. She just wanted all of this to be over. Once this was over...she wanted to be Mrs. Vakarian for sure. Maybe she wouldnt even wait that long.


	49. Hope For The Future

Heart Of Courage Chapter 49~Hope For The Future

Selena was pacing the waiting room,very impatiently. They forced her to leave the room after a dispute between her and the Doctor about her not being able to stay in the same room while he perfomed the tests. She was angry about it but she either agreed or got taken into C-Sec,she really didn't want Garrus to wake up and be told he needed to bail her out. He was going through enough right now,she didnt need to add to it.

She continued pacing. She was to anxious and wanted to be there but it was impossible to reason with an angry Salarian. She had very easily realized that when Mordin was aboard. She missed Mordin. He had insisted he needed to go up in the tower and save the Krogan. She told him it was non sense but he insisted on it and she couldnt reason with him. She could have stopped him in the worst way possible,shooting him. There was no frickin way she would do that or could do that. She may have been a very tough skinned woman but she had heart. People didnt believe it but she did.

"Garrus is done."

She ran to the Doctor and looked at him for an answer. Her eyes pleading him to answer an unasked question.

"He will be fine. Problem should be resolved. Take up to 2 days for him to wake up. Suggest getting a room. This is a very common procedure that we perform. Do not worry."

She felt a little bit of comfort in his words but she also found sorrow. It would be possibly 2 days til he woke up. She wanted him back now. Maybe it was selfish but she didnt care. She decided she would go get a room and let Terin and Solana know that it would be a few extra days til he would be ready to go back to the Normandy. She wanted to go get Garrus and somehow wake him up and take him back now but she knew that there was absolutely no way that would work and no way she could actually do it. This was for his well being.

She thanked the Doctor and walked out of the hospital. She hoped he would be okay. That he would still be himself when he woke up...that he would be her love again. She wanted to marry him,love him for enternity. She wanted to grow old together and die together no matter how they found their death. She didnt care if it was war or even just a freak accident...so long as they went together.

She ran up the stairs of the Citadel apartments to find Terin's apartment. She hoped they were home. Maybe she should have pinged him befoe she came to their apartment and let him know of her arrival. 'Oh well. Who am I to care? I'm just here to help...right?' She thought. She continued up the stairs. It was a spiral staircase. She thought it was mighty odd for there to be a staircase on the very futuristic Citadel but maybe thy had wanted to go classy with the apartments side. She apparently hadn't noticed the way the staircase was when she went to...his...apartment. She didnt even want to mention his name. Saying his name gave her chills and left a bad taste in her mouth that she hated.

She arrived at their apartment and knocked on their door. "Terin,Solana,are you home?"

A few moments later Terin answered the door looking worried. She knew he had been a C-Sec officer and knew human emotions. He could obviously tell she was stressed and she hated to admit it but scared. She was scared for Garrus and his outcome. She was also a bit scared for their future. She hoped that he was okay so they could have one.

"Just to let you know Garrus should be okay now and should be awake in at the most 2 days."

Terin looked suprised. "What the hell happened to my Son?"

So yeah she may have forgotten to mention her troubles with Garrus to Terin but she was busy and needed her full attention on Garrus. Atleast thats what she told herself.

"If I may come in I can explain it all to you." He opened his door wider to allow her access. She was nervous for this conversation but knew he was so worried he needed to know...and so did Solana. She was worried for her brother. Terin hadn't noticed she was behind him but Selena saw her face when she said that Garrus had been through another procedure. 'Please let this go okay. I would like to survive.' She thought as she entered and sat down. 'Here goes nothing.'


	50. Fight For Truth

Heart Of Courage Chapter 50~Fight For Truth

"Like I said,theres always more to the story then anyone lets on." Terin said frustrated.

"I know. Garrus had become very irrate at this point." Selena continued. "He had screamed at me for nothing,I hadn't done a thing. He tried to strangle his Doctor after he asked him a simple question. How are you?"

Terin and Solana looked at her in disbelief. She knew it was hard to wrap your head around and in some ways she doubted if they even believed her. She hoped she was wrong but a giant part of her told her otherwise. She couldn't show them what had happened because Garrus was unconscious and getting better...she hoped to God he was anyways. She continued on.

"He scared me but I kept going strong. I didn't know what to do. I was not going to hurt him in any way but I had to find a way to get him in for the tests without him trying to hurt me or someone else. The Doctor found a pair of cuffs that I could use,that actually helped matters a lot,but I had a surprise next. When I walked in the room...Garrus was fine and completely himself. I knew he wouldn't stay like that for long and that I had to hurry. I apologized and cuffed him. He didn't know why he was cuffed and it made me sick to my stomach to know I am putting fear into the heart of my love. I knew what was right and what I had to do even though I didn't want to,I knew it was for his own good. I took him into the room and laid him down while the Doctor took blood samples. He then gave him a calming drug to help him sleep during the tests. Thats where we are now. Garrus is currently asleep. He doesn't completely know everything but I explained most of it to him before he fell asleep. He atleast will have the piece of mind to know that even though he had some kind of problem he will be okay now. I couldn't be more ready to see him. I want my Garrus back. The one who loves me an doesn't hate me." She finally took a breather and rested her head against the back of the chair. She finally had explained everything and she hoped that they understood and weren't angry with her. She hadn't done anything wrong.

"I see. When can we see him?"

"I'm honestly not sure if we can go in at anytime now or not. The Doctor didn't explain that to me. I can easily find out when I go back though. Your'e welcome to come with me and see him. If he tells me I can't go in...I have Spectre authority still,I can still use it and if it comes down to it I will." Terin growled when she said Spectre. She knew he had a thing against them because of that scumbag Saren. He gave not only Turians but Spectres a bad name.

"We will wait to see if you can go in or not. If you want to get in be my guest but I'm not following someone who has to use their Spectre authority to get in to places they shouldn't be."

Selena's eyes got big and she got mad. "Excuse me but if it wasn't for my Spectre authority I wouldn't have saved your asses back when Saren was indoctrinated. I saved you from the Collectors and am now saving you from Reapers. I have been a saving grace to you people and you don't even appreciate it, If it wasn't for me you guys would be dead. if it wasn't for me your son wouldn't be where he is,he is a wonderful soldier with a big heart. He deserves the best. Something you never gave him. He has told me about you before. You stopped him from joining the Spectres all because of your feelings towards it. You stopped your son from doing what he wanted to do and he paid for it. When I met him and he met me we changed each other. Used to I wouldn't have stuck around to even stick up for myself. I would have punched you and possibly killed you. I'm not that bad anymore. I helped Garrus rise to the ranks he is now. I wasn't there to actually help him to his rank now but if it wasn't for what I helped him with he wouldn't have ever gotten there. I'm sorry but thats the truth,like it or not. He is a much better man than you will ever be."

Selena stomped off and slammed the door. She couldnit have been more ready to get out of there. There was no way they were coming on board her ship. She liked Solana but she wanted nothing to do with Terin. Now she understood why Garrus had called him an ass many times. She hurried down the stairs to get to the elevator to go back to Huerta and check on Garrus. She hoped he was awake. She needed to see him and now. She got in the elevator and punched the button. "I'm coming Garrus."


	51. Strength

Heart of Courgage Chapter 51~Strength

Selena stomped out of the elevator. Everyone watched her intently knowing her temper. A lot of them didn't even know her really but they knew who she was. She had tried to rip a guys eyebrows off once for checking her out. She was much worse about her temper back then but that didn't mean it was under control. She hurried past the desk,ignoring the receptionist as she tried to stop her. She was not in the mood to have to mess with people...then again,she was never in the mood to deal with people. She went to Doctor Theron's door and knocked furiously. "Open the door." She ground out through clenched teeth. The lock was still red. She knew he was in there. His door would have been open if not. "Hey!" Still nothing. She had had it. She went back to the desk. "Where is Doctor Theron?"

"Hes in his office Ma'm."

She rolled her eyes. "Okay fine. I just knocked on his door and he wouldn't answer. Can I go see Garrus?"

"I'm sorry Ma'm but your'e not allowed to go back there without a Doctor's approval."

It was apparently time to use it. "I have Spectre authority and I will use it if I have to." She took on a darker tone. "I need to see Garrus,now." The poor receptionist looked terrified and she had every right to be. She hoped she scared her til she crapped her pants to be honest. She was tired of messing with people who neither listened nor seemed to care what her problem was.

"Umm,yes Ma'm. You can go back now."

"Thank You." She said in a pleasant tone that she was so not actually feeling.

She walked back towards his room and opened the door. He was laying down still asleep. She hoped he would wake up soon. The sooner he woke up and recovered the sooner they could be out of here. She sat down in a chair next to him and turned on her data pad. She had been reading this "book",it was called Pride and Prejudice,she actually really liked it. It was a very old book from way back in time. It had been converted for their technology. She wanted to know more about that time period,she was just never able to read. But as it turned out she was going to have plenty of time to read now that she was on maternity leave. She didn't want to leave the Alliance for anything,but she had no choice. She knew she was being stupid. She could go back as soon as she had recovered from the pregnancy. She was definently starting to hate this though. She was starting to gain weight,hell she had started a few weeks ago. She was very excited for the pregnancy...she was just not looking forward to the weight gain,swelling,mood swings...pain. She was a a soldier,she had a very high tolerance for pain,that didn't mean she liked it. She looked back to her data pad and continued reading.

The next hour passed and she looked up to check on Garrus for the 4th time in an hour. He was still sound asleep. In the silence her mind started racing again. She wondered what the child would look like,she somewhat worried what it would look like. Would the child get bullied and teased because of the way it looked? Or would the child look perfectly normal and just take on Garrus' traits like the Asari. She knew that was a a stupid thing to think though. She was human,he was turian...what did she expect,the perfect child? For the most part she didn't care at all what it looked like,she would love it just the same. She looked back at the time and realized another 45 minutes had passed. Her stomach was growling at her so she finally got up and left the room to get some food. She didn't really want anything but she was pregnant,she needed to eat not only for herself but for it. She decided she would go to the cafe in the wards and started for the elevator. Before she walked out the door she went back to the front desk.

"If Garrus wakes up while I'm gone,make sure to ping me."

She gave her a weird look. "I'm just the receptionist Ma'm."

"Then notify a nurse of this for me will you! I have been through so much stress lately I feel like I could explode. I just want to go get some frickin food in some frickin peace and quiet!" She had finally lost her temper and she knew that was coming. She felt bad kind of but she couldn't help it. There comes a time when you reach a breaking point. That was hers.

She stomped out of the hospital and got into the elevator. She then realized she had forgotten to leave her number at the desk. She leaned her head back against the back of the elevator with an aubible 'thump'. She was so exhausted...she just wanted to be out of here. She was tired of white sterile walls and the smell of anti biotics. The only time she had any real relief was when she went to the wards and just set down on a bench. A C-sec officer once thought she was homeless because she was sleeping on a bench. They took that statement back when they saw her face. They knew who she was. The elevator stopped and she went straight for the cafe. Thankfully there wasn't really any people there right now. Maybe she could find some peace here tonight.


	52. Patience Is A Virtue

Heart Of Courage Chapter 52~Patience Is A Virtue

A/N~Short chapter update! Hope everyone likes it and please R&R!~

She sat in a chair staring off into the distance. She was afraid to look up...she didn't know why...she just was. She had this haunting feeling that when Garrus woke up nothing would be different. He would still have two personalities and they woud have no future. It truly scared her. She had faced the Collectors...she had faced death but facing the fact that she and Garrus may not have a future truly scared her. She saw a waitress walk towards her out of the corner of her eye.

"Can I get anything else for you?" She asked politely.

"No thank you." She said in a calm tone that she wasn't feeling.

The Asari waitress walked to the next table. Selena watched her walk from table to table and she wondered how much she really liked this job. Did she sometimes get told more than she wanted when she just simply asked what someone wanted? Did she ever have to escort drunk people out? She had numerous questions that would remain unanswered. She picked up her glass of water and took a drink. She freaked out when she dropped her glass and water went all over her data pad that had Pride and Prejudice on it.

"No! No!" She yelled. The same waitress from earlier hurried over with a few towels to soak up the water. Selena honestly didn't care about the mess she had made. She cared about her data pad. She had paid 1,000 credits for Pride and Prejudice. It wasn't like she couldn't afford that but it was the fact of waitress smiled at her and reassured her that it was an accident. She smiled back at her even though she really didn't feel like it she figured she might as well be somewhat polite.

"Its alright Ma'm. Easy clean up."

"Thanks." Selena said.

"I'll be on my way out now. Can I have a water to take with me?"

"Of course!"

"Oh,can you make that two?"

"Sure."

She watched her walk away. She figured she better get Garrus something. 'He shoud be waking up...' She said to herself. Just then her Omni-Tool pinged. She knew it couldn't have been the hospital. She had forgotten to leave her number there. When she brought it up it was a shock. She was just about to read it when the waitress came back with her two waters. Selena paid her bill and gave the waitress her tip. She hurried out of the cafe so she could read her message. The message read:

Lena,

Wherever you went I'm awake. I feel great. Hope your'e coming back soon. I can't wait to see you.

Garrus.

Selena stood there in absolute shock. He had woken up and she wasn't there. Just another promise she had broken. She had told him she would be there and she wasn't. She smacked herself mentally. What was she thinking? She should have stuck around...she shouldn't have left. She hurried to the elevator. She wanted to see him more than anything. She punched in the code for Huerta and the elevator started. She was shifting her weight from foot to foot anxiously and biting her lip in anticipation. She bit down til she tasted blood,she immediately quit. The elevator doors opened and she rushed past the receptionist,who didn't even bother to stop her this time. She opened his door and found him sitting up in a chair overlooking the main window. He turned around to face her and for the first time in a long time she saw the real him in his eyes. "Hey beautiful."


	53. New Beginning

Heart Of Courage Chapter 53~New Beginning

"Garrus." It wasn't a question...it was a simple statement. She was so happy to be able to look at him and see the real Garrus.

He got up from his chair and walked over in front of her,placing one hand on her cheek. She leaned into his touch and sighed. She closed her eyes and secretly pinched herself on her thigh to be sure she wasn't dreaming. She was glad...she wasn't. When she reopened her eyes she stared into ice blue eyes. "Happy to see me?" He asked.

"You have no idea." She said as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She pulled herself to him as tight as she could and just savored the moment. Selena was more than glad that he was himself again. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his head in her neck. She turned her head slightly as she didn't ever let anyone see her cry,not even Garrus. She knew he could tell though because he began to pull her tighter. She saw the giant wet tear stain on his shirt and she tried to "brush" it off.

"It's alright. Don't worry about it." He said gently as he grabbed her hand and brought it to his mouth to kiss her palm.

She smiled at him but had to ask. "Where did you learn that move?" She asked.

He rubbed the back of his neck. something he always did when he was nervous. "Theres nothing to be nervous about." She smiled at him and then nodded for him to continue.

"While I was in my old room,when you weren't there I had to watch vids to occupy myself...so there was this one,I've seen it before but its called Fleet and Flotilla. Its a love story between a Turian and a Quarian. As a romantic move he kisses her palm." He stopped and paced for a moment,still rubbing his neck. "I thought it might be something nice to do."

She stood there smiling at him. Her smile getting bigger as he went on. She had never had anyone so devoted to her. It was new to her but all the same wonderful. He was still pacing and she walked right in front of him and kissed him. He stopped dead in his tracks and just stood there. When she backed up she wondered if she had made a mistake,he still hadn't moved. He finally took in a breath and so did she without realizing she was holding it.

"Well that was...not unpleasant."

"Your point?" She asked playfully.

He didn't say anymore and she knew now that it wasn't because of a mistake,it was more of he didn't want to embarass himself more. It didn't bother her but he was easily embarrased. She smiled at him again and turned around to leave before things got to awkward. He hadn't said anymore so she figured she should leave. He grabbed her on her arm and spun her around til she faced him.

"Where do you think you're going?" He asked.

"Nowhere if you want me to stay."

"I'd prefer it. I have to stay in here one more day and then I'm free to go with you back to the Normandy. I'm more than ready to be out of here. The doctor said that I would be fine now. I'm ready to be home where I belong. I don't want to be here in these four white walls anymore." She nodded in understanding. She knew how it was. For one when Cerberus brought her back she had been in a mass of white walls everwhere. Also she had been in this hispital with him for so many days it was about to drive her insane. She had spent enough time in the Normandy's medbay to know it too. She was more than ready to leave here for good for awhile too.

"Believe me I understand." She said before she followed him to the small couch in his room. They both sat down and she curled up against him and laid her head against his chest. He rubbed her back. She loved when he did that. She was starting to fall asleep when one of his talons caught a knot in her hair. She mouthed 'ow' and rubbed her head.

"Sorry. Apparently I need to cut my talons." He moved his hand around til it let go of the knot and went back to rubbing her back. She sighed and nestled in tighter. The last thing she remembered was Garrus watching her as she drifted off to sleep.

She jumped up when she heard a noise coming from behind her. It was Garrus with a tray of food. "Hey sleepy head. You hungry?"

She smiled and sniffed the air. She could smell the coffee and eggs. For a hospital they didn't have bad food. She ate here with him one night. "I could definently eat." She sat up to make room for him to sit. He took her coffee off the tray and set it on the end table next to her. She grabbed her cup and started to take a drink when she felt him sit down next to her. The shift in weight about made her coffee go all over her but she got lucky. She sat her cup back down and grabbed a fork and started eating. Garrus sat there just watching her for a moment.

"Aren't you going to eat?" She asked concerned.

"Yeah. I just missed you so much. Even though I have been here,even before I was sedated...I wasn't myself. I don't really remember much after my Father and Sister came. After that all I can remember is when you brought me to the other room to have the tests done. I was nervous and didn't know what was going on. I was never so glad to wake up and feel like myself. It was like I wasn't even there anymore. I can't remember."

"Not much happened after that. There really isn't much you could have missed. I'm just happy you're yourself now."

It seemed to click with him right then that she was pregnant because she felt his hand go over her stomach. She smiled at the touch and put her hand over his. "Have you thought of any names?" He asked.

She nodded. "No,I don't know the gender yet. I go back here soon. I'm going to ask Chakwas if she can just do my exam on the Normandy. I don't want to come back here if I don't have to once we leave."

He nodded in understanding. She knew he wanted to leave too. They had just talked about that. She finished her food and looked over at Garrus who had already cleared his plate. "Did you chew it? Let alone did you taste it?" He laughed when she said that. He just shrugged and brought up his omni-tool.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"I want to have a picture of you from each month as your pregnancy progresses. I realize this isn't really a great place for the picture but it's good enough,right?"

"I suppose." If there was one thing that he knew about her that was that she did not like her picture taken. He knew it but she also thought it would be a neat idea to do that so she just grinned and didn't worry about it. She stood up and turned to the side in front of the window. It gave the picture a gorgeous background. He snapped the picture and she immediately went back to her seat. "No more pictures." He knew she wasn't mad about him taking the picture. She was as she was about to say something the doctor walked in.

"You're clear to go home Garrus. It was nice meeting both of you."

"Nice meeting you too." She said cheerfully. He was clear to go home. They could step back onto the Normandy and not have to worry about coming back,unless it was absolutely necessary of course. They smiled at each other and hurried out of the room hand in hand. They were talking the whole way to the Docking Bay. As soon as they got there Garrus stopped her before she went into the airlock. "What is it?"

He took a deep breath and looked her straight in the eyes. "I don't have any of the proper things that I need but..." He stopped and grabbed her hands. "Would you do me the great honor of becoming Mrs. Vakarian?"

She stared at him for a moment before embracing him. What did he think she was going to say? No? "Yes Garrus, yes!" Garrus grabbed her and spun her around. "i don't have a ring but I will get one..."

"I don't need a ring to know you love me." He grabbed her hand and led her through the airlock. This was the beginning to a new life. A family. It was going to be hard to raise a child with the war going on but they could make it. Her only problem wa she hoped the child would grow up with parents. She was going to fight for life. She was going to fight for family. She was going to fight for their child and she knew Garrus was going to do the same. She couldn't wait for the next chapter of their life. Was this the end,no,this was only the beginning.

A/N~Booyah! Last chapter. I hope everyone likes it. Please R&R! I want to give a big thank you to all of my Heart Of Courage fans for the reviews,favorites,follows and continued support. I am actually currently working on the continuation of this story and I hope all of my fans will read that one as well! Once again I really appreciate your support and if there is any ideas you may have that you would like me to write just PM me!~


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